


We'll Make It Big

by spaloon



Category: PaRappa the Rapper, Um Jammer Lammy
Genre: F/F, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, everyone is bad at feelings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2017-11-06
Packaged: 2018-10-24 03:12:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10732956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spaloon/pseuds/spaloon
Summary: Katy wants to enter Milkcan in a statewide Battle of the Bands, Rammy wants revenge on her doppleganger, and Lammy just wishes her brain could work right.





	1. last night i woke up from a terrible dream

Late.

_Late._

  ** _Late._**

 She was going to be so late- _again._ What was this now? The fifth time? The fiftieth time? There was no way they were going to excuse her now. Not with the huge concert tonight.

 Lammy pushed past door after door, Tourist after stage hand after Band manager, almost tripping half way over an exposed cord. She regained her balance and fully sprinted down the hall, running into some poor assistant holding coffee on the way. They both screamed, the hot mocha splashing on the floor and on themselves. Lammy didn't have time to worry about that, though. With a chorus of "S-sorry, sorry, sorry-" She scrambled to her feet and continued on. The hallway felt so long, like it was impossible to reach the end.

 How long had she been running? Why were there so many obstacles in the way?

 It felt like hours before she had reached the final door. There was a large green light above, and a sign that said 'CENTER STAGE'. That had to be it.

 Lammy took a moment to catch her breath. There was a stabbing pain in her side from running for so long, her clothes felt sticky and wet, and she reeked of coffee. She swallowed, tugging at the strap of her guitar case. At least she still managed to have _that._

 Holding her breath and preparing for the worst, Lammy pushed open the door. Lights blinded her from every angle, and the cheers of the crowd were almost  deafening. There was the distinct sound of music in the air- but that couldn't be Milkcan, could it? They were the only band on bill that night.

 But there was no doubt about it. That was _definitely_ Katy's voice. For some reason, Lammy couldn't identify the song she was singing- like it was something they'd never played before.

 Lammy covered her eyes, trying to lower the glare. She was only behind the back stage curtain, so why was it so _bright?_ She fought to push the thing open, but it was so heavy. She pushed with all her might, not getting any leeway, until-

 Lammy fell through it and to the floor of the stage with a loud _Thump,_ the music screeching to a halt. The wind was knocked out of her, and she could barely keep her head up. She groaned, raising her arm.

 "I-I'm here."

 "Oh, there you are, Lammy!" exclaimed a pleasant voice from the right of her. Katy's voice. Lammy felt a soft hand move to pull her to her feet, which she was grateful for.

 There the vocalist stood, fully decked out in her costume for the concert, a cool jacket and jeans. She grinned wide at Lammy, like she was overjoyed at her being there. "You sure are late." Her hands were on her hips, her tail swishing from side to side impatiently. ...There was something off here.

 Lammy blinked, then stuttered, trying to quickly come up with an excuse. "I-I'm so, so sorry Katy, I don't know what happened- I just- I g-guess my alarm didn't-" Katy hushed her, putting a finger to her lips.

 "Hey, Lammy, don't worry about it." She pulled back her hand, then smiled. She gave a little shrug. "I learned a long time ago you don't care about this band."

 It took a second to process her words. Lammy blinked again. She was doing that a lot. "W-wait, what? But- But I _love_ Milkcan-"

 "Yeah, that's why you're always late, right?" Snapped back Katy, but her voice was still as cheery as ever. She backed up on the stage, back to where her microphone stand was. Lammy instinctively followed her, not knowing what else to do. "Or why you never seem to want to play when I work so _hard_ to set these concerts up?"

 "K-Katy, I-" Lammy stammered, reaching out a hand to her friend, but Katy only stepped away. "Y-you know that's not why I-"

 Katy huffed, grabbing her mic and hitching up the strap of her bass. "Look, Lammy. Save it, okay? It's fine. We found someone else to play your part. You don't have to bother yourself with this any more."

 Lammy's eyes widened, not believing what she'd heard. As Katy turned her back to her, she slipped to her knees, her breath hitching, almost turning into sobs. Her face felt hot, and her head throbbed.

 "K-Katy, please... I can do it, I just..."

 They _replaced_ her? But this band was her life- They couldn't-  She-

 She...

 "Hey, chump."

 She rose her head, a dark shadow of a figure looming over her. And she looked familiar... As familiar as looking in a mirror. Lammy rubbed her eyes, not really being able to put together what she was seeing. It was her, but wrong- like all the color had been drained out of her.

 "Looks like I really was the better guitarist after all, huh?" Her doppleganger's voice was smug as she swung her guitar side to side, almost threateningly. Lammy scrambled backwards, her voice caught in her throat, her head spinning. This all felt so _familiar..._

 "You should just go home so we can finish this set, Lammy," Katy spoke into the mic, and it amplified her voice over the speakers. "You don't need to be here." Her words echoed in Lammy's brain non-stop.

 Almost on cue, Ma-san, who had been quiet the entire time, climbed down from her drum set and made her way over to Lammy. It didn't take much for her to lift her over her head and walk to the edge of the stage, where the crowd still cheered below. Lammy wailed, struggling to get away, but Ma-san was too strong. She didn't want to be thrown to them- there were so _many._

 But Ma-san threw her anyway.

 The crowd was thick, and loud, and Lammy was choking, their hands grasping at her and pulling her under until she could hardly breathe. She gasped for air but there was none. They pulled her under until she could no longer see the light overhead. The music had started up again, and it was deafening.

 

* * *

 

 And then, Lammy woke up.

 

 She sat up like a bolt of lightning had struck her and gasped, a hand to her head. She was drenched from head to toe in sweat. Lammy let her breath even out as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes, a headache already starting to build in the back of her head.

 "Ohh... What a nightmare..."

 There was loud music playing from somewhere beside her. It was her ringtone- her phone was ringing. Lammy fumbled with the device for a second before flipping it open. "H... Hello?"

 "Lammy!" Came the voice from the other end, chipper and full of energy. It was Katy. Of course it was Katy. Lammy breathed out a sigh as she pulled the covers off of herself. Usually she'd be happy to hear her voice, but that _dream..._

 "H-hey, Katy... what's up?" Lammy said anyway, leaning her head against the phone.

 "Boy, you sure sound tired. Rough night?" Katy had lowered her voice a little, concerned. She always had a knack for noticing things like that.

 Lammy looked at her clock. The time showed 2:53pm. Rough afternoon, more like... "Y-you could say that..."

 There was a small thump against the receiver. "Well hey, I was wondering- If you're feeling up to it- I was hoping you and Ma-san could stop by the diner here in an hour, when I get off?" Katy sounded excited, and Lammy couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm. "I already called Ma-san- It'll be _really_ groovy. Promise!"

 Lammy snickered at her use of the word groovy, and nodded. "Y-yeah, okay. I'll be there."

 She could hear Katy whisper an ecstatic 'yes!' over the phone, and she put a hand over her mouth to stop herself from giggling. She felt a little stupid for even dreaming up such a negative version of this girl. "Okay, I'll see you then! I gotta move- My breaks almost over, or I'd chat you up for a few more minutes. Later, Lammy!" Katy sounded rushed, and Lammy could imagine she was hurriedly putting her apron back on.

 "Later, Katy," She replied, flopping backwards onto her bed with a small smile. There was a quiet beep, the sound of Katy hanging up. Lammy let out a long breath, staring at the ceiling. She wished she could find the energy to be as chipper as Katy always seemed to be. She never failed to make her smile. Why couldn't _she_ be like that?

 The ceiling didn't seem to have an answer for her.

 

* * *

 

"Now, you must be wondering why I called you all here today."

 Katy paced around the diner table, her tail swaying to and fro. She looked serious, her face set into a concentrated expression. Lammy, who was idly sipping on her milkshake, threw a glance at Ma-san from across the table. The drummer didn't seem too concerned as she flipped through her Occult Physics book, and stayed silent. It looked like Lammy had to be the one to speak up.

 "Um... B-because..." She struggled to remember if there were any important dates that had slipped her mind. Nobody's birthday was this month, and it definitely wasn't a holiday... Was she forgetting something? It wouldn't be the first time. "You... Like having a good time with friends?" She hesitated a guess, giving Katy a sheepish grin.

 Katy visibly softened. "... Well, that's true, but not exactly why. I actually called you here because-" She dug in her pants pocket for a hot moment before fishing out a tightly folded piece of paper. "Someone left a whole stack of _these_ at the diner." She hurriedly unfolded it and smacked it onto the table for her band mates to read. Ma-san flicked her ears upwards, finally paying attention, and craned her head over her book.

 "What’s that?" She mumbled, in her odd little voice. Katy frowned.

 "Why don't you _read it_ and find out?" She snipped back, patience obviously growing short.

 Lammy decided to follow Katy's instruction and scanned the page, which turned out to be a flier, and read the bold printed words aloud.

 "R-Rodney State Battle of the Bands... Rock bands encouraged to enter, and will compete for a chance at a Grand Prize of-"

  _"Ten thousand dollars?"_ Ma-san interrupted, incredulous. She had closed her book and was now standing on the table to get a better look at the flier. Lammy noticed one of the waitresses giving her a dirty look from across the room.

 "That's not all," added Katy with a grin, and she leaned forward to tap the next part. "The winner also gets a contract with Soul Sister Productions- you know, that big record company?-to produce an album. With that sort of promotion we'd hit it big for _sure!"_

 As Katy spoke, Lammy felt as if a rock was sinking to the very bottom of her stomach. This was a lot of information to process at once. "O-oh, wow... that seems like a pretty big deal..."

 "It's more than a 'big deal'," affirmed Katy, who moved to put a hand on Lammy's shoulder. The guitarist swallowed, looking up at her. She had a hard determination in her eyes; like the decision had already been made in her head. "This is the push we need, Lammy! We just have to sign up for this battle of the bands thing and that record deal is ours." She squeezed her shoulder a little for emphasis, which Lammy assumed was meant to encourage her. The rock, however, only sunk deeper.

 "We have to _win_ the battle of the bands, too," interjected Ma-san, folding her arms, as if she'd read Lammy's mind. "For that much money, there's no way everybody and their dog isn't going to sign up for it."

 Katy huffed in response, fixing a strand of hair that had fallen out of place during her excitement. "Ma-san, have you _heard_ our band? We'll blow the competition out of the water."

 "B-but what if we don't? What- What if they don't like us?" stammered Lammy, finally. The possibilities of failure had already begun to stack in her mind, and she nervously balled her fists into the fabric of her shirt.

 Katy simply smiled her toothy little smile. She didn't seem concerned in the slightest. "They'll like us! What's not to like? We've got killer vocals, a groovy rhythm, and the best guitarist around." She gave Lammy a wink as she said that, joined by a playful little nudge on the shoulder. Lammy's heart almost skipped a beat. She didn't want to disagree, with Katy looking at her like that. She didn't want to disappoint her. But there was still a nagging in Lammy's mind that somehow, she'd mess this up for all of them if she took any part in it. That was enough to keep her glued to her chair.

 There was an audible sigh from Ma-san, who had gotten back into her seat. "Well, I'm not saying no. If I turned down a shot like that my dad wouldn't let me hear the end of it." Katy snorted at that.

 "Glad to hear you're on board. What about you, Lammy?" She gave a curious look to the girl in question, tilting her head. "You haven't sounded too enthusiastic so far..."

 Lammy sheepishly shrugged her shoulders and had to look away from Katy. "I-I dunno, I just..." She was having a hard time coming up with an excuse better than 'I don't want you to be upset if I screw it all up.'  Instead, she changed the subject. "W-where's it being held at?"

 Katy furrowed her brow at the sudden question, and Lammy was worried she would press her further.  She didn't. Instead, she turned her gaze to the flier still on the table. "Uh... Actually, that's a good question." She traced a claw underneath the words until she found her answer, ears perking up. Lammy raised a brow, surprised that Katy hadn't seemed to have reviewed the flier more thoroughly. "Says here it's in Greenville, at the Fall Flats Festival..."

 "Greenville?" Piped up Ma-san, "That's like two days away by car! How are we gonna get there?" Katy paused, and seemed to curse under her breath. Lammy could only assume it had to be about how unreasonably big Rodney state was.

 Katy put a hand to her head, brow furrowed as she thought. "Well, after last time, I don't trust us to take a plane." Lammy sunk a little in her seat, feeling Ma-san's eyes on her. "And it would be too much money anyway..." Katy paced in a circle around the diner table, running a hand through her hair in frustration. "... I'll think of something. I want us all to ride together. We'll like... Hitch a trailer on Lammy's motorcycle if we have to." Katy stopped pacing and sighed again. "I'll have to look into this a little more. It's still a week and a half away, though. We have time to make up our minds and get something together! I can check their website tonight." She looked to her band mates, a little more relaxed. "Does that sound good with you guys?"

 Ma-san shrugged, giving her a non-committal "Yeah, sure."

 Satisfied with that, Katy turned her eyes to Lammy and rose a brow. Lammy blinked, realizing Katy expected an answer from her, and rubbed the back of her neck nervously. "Uh, I-I mean... I guess...?"

 "... Are you sure?" Katy caught on to Lammy's reluctance and leaned over the table, putting a hand on her shoulder. Lammy really wished she hadn't. "What's the matter?"

 Lammy's mouth felt dry. She swirled her milkshake around with her straw to distract herself. By this point it was melted, and all of the candy bits inside had fallen to the bottom. Fruitlessly she sipped at it, until a hunk of chocolate got stuck inside of her straw and she had to stop. "I-I don't know." She muttered, finally. "I d-don't know if I'm ready for something like that."

 Katy pursed her lips. She was definitely trying to hide the disappointment on her face. _'You never seem to want to play when I work so hard to set these concerts up.'_ Katy's voice repeated Lammy's mind, and she tried to swallow it down, but it was still there. "Well... We've still got a few weeks. You can just- Just think about it. We can't do it if there's only two of us, ya know."

 "I know," said Lammy, looking at her shoes. The guilt was already starting to fester in her stomach. Why couldn't she just say yes without being such a _baby_ about it? They couldn't do it if there was only two of them, which means if Lammy said no, Katy would find a replacement. Someone who didn't mind failing. Or someone who wouldn't fail at all.

 "Jeeze, what happened to all of that 'The guitar is in my mind!' stuff?" mumbled Ma-san, waving a hand in the air. Katy quickly gave her chair leg a sharp kick under the table in response, making her yelp. "Hey-! What? I'm just saying-"

 Katy was curt. She was angry. She was angry at Lammy. "Hush. It's fine." Which was something someone who was angry would say, "She can take her time. I haven't even organized this yet!"

 "I'm sorry," said Lammy, quietly. "Ma-San's right. I'm being stupid-" Katy hushed her, too, putting a finger to her lips. Surprised, Lammy clammed up, a blush creeping up her cheeks.

 "Hey now, cut that out! I know I sprung this on you really fast. I understand." Katy stated, matter-of-factly, "It was just an idea, anyway. I don't even know If we'll go through with it." Lammy melted, nodding her head. Katy's voice was confident, but soothing. It made her feel less bad- if only a little.

 Katy smiled and stood up straight. "We can go home, get some rest. I'll look into this website, and call you guys tomorrow after work, okay?" After a moment, a realization hit her, and she pressed a hand to her head. "Oh god, I'm going to have to call out of work... And move poetry class, and..." She sunk against the dining table, trailing off.

 "Sounds like you've got your hands full," Said Ma-san, who then checked her wrist as if she was wearing a watch, even though she obviously wasn't, "It's almost 5, so I have to go meet up with my dad at the pharmacy. I'll see you guys later."

 Katy gave her a weak thumbs up from her spot at the table. "I'll keep you posted, okay?"

 Ma-san didn't reply, but the ringing of the door bell indicated she had left. Lammy watched her go, then turned her head to her friend, sitting with her head propped up on her chin. It was her turn to put her hand on Katy's shoulder.

 "H-hey... You want a ride home? I brought my motorcycle." It was a weak offer, but she figured she'd give Katy something other than disappointment tonight. Katy lifted her head up, giving her a smile.

 "That'd be awesome, Lammy." Katy gave a tired grunt as Lammy helped her to her feet, and she stretched, yawning wide. "Maybe it wouldn't hurt to sleep on this for a bit. I'm beat."

Lammy smiled, but she dreaded the conversation she knew they'd have tomorrow. Still- it was something for future Lammy to deal with. For now, she could enjoy the cool afternoon air on her face and the feeling of Katy's arms wrapped around her waist as she drove her home.


	2. and i try but i can't and i want to so bad

Lammy had barely gotten any sleep since last night. Between stressing out about the next day and the inability to get comfortable in her own bed, resting had been a losing battle for her. She fell asleep and woke up in shifts of two hours maximum, thirty minutes at the least between each because she just couldn't get _comfortable._ Every so often there was an annoying tap tap tap in the apartment above her, who's only goal seemed to be to keep her from falling back asleep.

 She woke up for the fourth time an hour before her alarm was set to go off, from a dream she could only describe as vaguely ominous. She had been driving on a long stretch of road, at sunset- or maybe dawn- and Katy was there, with her arms wrapped tightly around her waist and head resting against her shoulder blades. Ma-san sat next to them in her little side car, reading a book, somehow, despite the wind whipping around them. It would have been nice, if the dream hadn't ended with them driving off the edge of a cliff.

 Restless, Lammy stared at the ceiling until she forced herself to look at something else. She needed to get ready to go to Katy's house at some point- Katy would be heading home soon, if the note she had left her was still accurate.

 Lammy looked at the paper from where she lay, taped haphazardly to her alarm clock. A pink receipt from the diner, with _'My house, 5pm! Don't forget! ~Katy'_ written in Katy's swooping cursive. For just a moment, Lammy considered the possibility of telling Katy she fell asleep, or got sick- in fact, why not take it a step farther? After all, what was stopping her from never answering the phone again, packing a bag and driving away, living in the north for the next few years under an assumed identity?

 "I could dye my hair brown and rename myself Slammy," Lammy said out loud, to no one in particular. "Live in a city and play guitar under a bridge. What do you think?" She looked over at her alarm clock for its opinion. Its face kept its unchanging goofy expression, hands ticking away quietly. It very decidedly did not answer her. Lammy groaned and rolled over, burying her face in her pillow. "Ugh... What's _wrong_ with me. This is so _stupid."_

 If she was being honest with herself, it wasn't the actual idea of failing that scared her. It was the idea of failing her bandmates. Katy had been waiting for something like this since they'd gotten the band together, and Ma-san... Ma-san _definitely_ needed the money. Hell, they all did. Ma-san was always trying to get customers for her dad's pharmacy, and Katy was barely scraping by in rent, and Lammy could hardly pay off her motorcycle, let alone her apartment. If they lost just because of her screw ups...

 And what if they won?

 Lammy had heard all of the stories about fame going to a budding rock stars head. What if it changed them? What if they got so famous they were pulled apart? Bands broke up all the time for the pettiest reasons. She didn't want what they all had to change. She couldn't even handle the thought.

 The clock continued its tireless job, seconds passing into minutes, and Lammy continued to stare at it. Her mind was going a mile with every minute that went by and 5pm was only getting closer and closer.

 Suddenly, Lammy sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed. She couldn't deal with this later- she'd spent so much time wallowing in her anxiety that later had already come. She reached over to the floor, picked up a tank top, and slipped it on. Her spine popped loudly as she did so and she hissed, quietly, putting a hand to her back. _Way_ too much time spent laying in bed... It seemed to be all she did outside of work and band practice. Lammy never knew what to do on her off days. She should probably be grateful Katy was dragging her out of her apartment.

  _Speaking of..._

 Getting the tiniest inkling of an idea, Lammy looked at the clock again. The hands read 3:46pm. Katy got off at 4:00pm, and it took about forty minutes to get to Katy's house by bus, which Lammy knew Katy couldn't stand... Maybe she could do something productive after all. And, well... The inevitable happiness on Katy's face would just be a bonus.

 

* * *

 

 Lammy considered not wearing her helmet on the drive down to the diner. If it wasn't for the roar of the engine bothering her ears, she definitely would have. Something about the air whipping around her face, tussling up her hair as she drove... It felt nice. It felt relaxing, despite the rush it gave her. Riding her motorcycle down the calm streets of Parappa town was almost like playing her guitar, in a way. A tight grip on the handle, making sharp turns like it was nothing... It was all about getting to where she needed to go. No other thoughts behind it. It was instinctive. She felt stronger than her usual self- stronger than the normal Lammy could ever hope to be.

 It only took a few minutes to reach her destination. The sun was particularly hot that day, and Lammy had to shake sweat from her hair when she removed her helmet. Moisture was already dripping down her back, and she grimaced at the feeling. Tugging at her collar in an attempt to cool herself off, she looked at her watch. 3:55pm. Katy was going to be off soon, so she was here just in time, for once.

 Lammy tucked her helmet under her shoulder and entered the diner, deciding that air conditioning would be a lot more preferable than sitting out in the heat. The building wasn't full- a few people sat in booths as the two waitresses on duty milled about, refilling drinks. Neither of them were Katy. Lammy moved past them, to the bar area, and settled herself onto one of the stools. The atmosphere was pleasant enough, just as it usually was. The old rabbit who owned the place, Dot, had quickly moved over to her with notebook in hand.

 "Oh, Lammy, dear!" She exclaimed, adjusting her glasses, like she had just gotten a good look at Lammy for the first time. "You're probably looking for Katy, aren't you?"

 Lammy gave her a nod and a sheepish smile. "Y-yeah, I thought I'd give her a ride home." That made Dot smile warmly in return.

 "Such a sweet kid. I wish I had friends _half_ as good as you at your age." She put her notebook away and instead took up idly cleaning a dirty glass. "Ruffians, the whole lot of us. Would sell each other's souls for a cigarette..." Dot trailed off, shaking her head, leaving Lammy to fidget uncomfortably in her seat.

 "Uh... Is K-Katy around?" She asked, trying to get back on track.

 Dot's ears twitched upwards, and she blinked. "O-oh, right! She wandered off with a friend of hers, that little Sunny Funny, I think. Pretty sure she's around back. You want me to get her, hon?"

 Lammy shook her head with another small, grateful smile. "Nah, t-that's alright. I can find her." She slipped off the stool, making sure to grab her helmet. As she pushed the diner door open, she turned back with a wave. "Thanks, Dot!"

 The back alley of the diner was almost spotless, save for the dumpsters, and a few scattered newspapers left by sloppy customers. Lammy had been back here a few times- Katy liked to loiter here when she waited for the bus, because it was slightly more secluded than just waiting by the street. Katy had to insist several times that it wasn't loitering if she worked there. There was graffiti all along the brick walls, and, Lammy noted, one note in particular clearly spelling out the word _@!##$'._ ' That had to be Ma-san's. Her handwriting was _very_ distinct. Lammy didn't dwell on every little scratch on the walls, though- she made her way along the wall of the diner until she started to hear the distinct sound of a conversation, just around the corner.

 Lammy smiled. She knew _that_ voice anywhere. Rounding the corner, she could see Katy and another person, backs facing her, hunched over what she could only assume was a phone. Katy was talking very animatedly to the girl next to her, bumping arms with her in a friendly sort of fashion. Lammy remembered her- Sunny Funny, one of the most liked girls in town and one of Katy's closer friends. Dot had mentioned her- Lammy hadn't spent much time around the flora, only knew what Katy had told her, all of which was incredibly positive.

 She hung back, not really wanting to bother them. They looked like they were having fun, and Lammy didn't want to get in the way of that, especially if Katy treasured their time together as much as it sounded like she did. She stayed in her spot around the corner and leaned her head against the brick wall, waiting for a good time to speak up.

 It was hard not to hear little snippets of their conversation though- Not that Lammy was trying to be nosey, but Katy's voice certainly carried in the narrow alleyway.

 "You should hear the names of some of these bands trying to enter," She giggled, _"Black Nylon Lovers, Mascara Masque and the Spectres, All Girl Summer Funk Fest..."_

 "That last one sounds good, actually," replied Sunny, sounding genuinely interested. Lammy silently agreed- though she was more curious about _Mascara Masque_ herself. Katy sighed, also seeming to agree.

 "Yeah, you're right. They all sound really good. Kinda makes me wish I hadn't picked such a short band name..."

 "Hey, at least it fits on a T-shirt, right?"

 Katy laughed. "Oh, yeah. Though I don't know if people are buying our shirts because they like the band or because if they add an 'S' to the end it would make a good boob joke."

 "Huh? How?" asked Sunny, the eyebrow raise evident in her tone.

 "You know, like... 'Milkcans.' 'Cause people call boobs 'cans' sometimes?" Katy began to explain, a little awkwardly, "And milk... Can..." She trailed off, and Lammy could only imagine the face Sunny was giving her. "Come on, Sunny! You know!"

 There was a giggle, and Sunny responded with, "I mean, if you say so! I wouldn't know anything about that!"

 "Oh yeah, _right-_ "

 They joked among each other, and Lammy felt bad for eavesdropping on the two like this. At this point, that's what it was, right? And Katy was laughing so hard. Lammy wished she got to hear that more often. She wished _she_ made Katy laugh like that... It was a sudden thought that she quickly shook away. She turned to make her leave, deciding Katy would come out when she was ready, when Sunny spoke up again.

 "So, have you decided if you're gonna enter? The Battle of the Bands, I mean."

 Lammy stopped in her tracks and slunk back over to the corner. She would be lying if she said she wasn't interested in Katy's answer- after all, Lammy still hadn't made her decision. There was a sigh, and the sound of her shoe scratching against the pavement. "I mean I want to, but..."

  _"But?"_

 Lammy swallowed.

 "Lammy hasn't told me if she wanted to yet. She seems really nervous about it, so I don't know what she wants to do."

 There was a familiar tightening feeling in Lammy's chest, and she slunk back halfway, chewing her lip. She had to remember that she was doing this to herself.

 "Did she say why?"

 "No, but she usually doesn't, so there's nothing new there." There was a skittering across the pavement, like a rock had been kicked. "She just seems to... I dunno, clam up? I wish she'd talk to me more about what's bothering her."

 "Mm." was the response from Sunny. "But you can't force it, either. You should let her come to you. She'll talk when she's ready, I think."

 Would she? Lammy pressed her back against the brick wall, head falling into her hands. Katy was obviously frustrated with her. How much longer could she keep this up? Why couldn't she just say what was wrong with her? _Why couldn't she just figure out what was wrong with her?_

 Katy groaned, exasperated. "That's the thing though. We can't wait much longer, there's a deadline. If we do enter, we'd be _really_ cutting it close. I feel bad for wanting to push her, but..."

 "Well, I could always pick up guitar again, if you need a third. It's been awhile since we played together, anyway." Sunny was obviously making a joke, but it still made Lammy seize up, breath catching in her throat at the thought. Katy simply brushed her off with a quiet laugh.

 "Please, if you could pick up all of our songs on that dinky acoustic guitar that fast, you'd be some kind of musical genius. And, besides..." She paused, and Lammy had to lean forward slightly, because she started to lower her voice. "I wouldn't be able to replace Lammy with anyone. I don't think anyone else could have the same kind of energy she does."

 All at once, Lammy felt a sense of relief flow through her. Katy wouldn't replace her... Katy hadn't even been thinking about it. She let herself breathe, and pressed her head against the brick wall. _The same kind of energy..._ Well, at least she had _that_ going for her.

 Sunny giggled. "The energy, _right._ I guess you still haven't told her, then?" Immediately, Lammy's ears perked up. Once again, she was sucked back into a conversation she shouldn't have been hearing in the first place.

 "I don't know what you're talking about," replied Katy, in a way that totally sounded like she knew what she was talking about.

 "You can't keep putting it off forever," pressed Sunny. Lammy couldn't tear herself away from that corner, even as the anxiety clenched at her chest.

 Katy snorted. "Oh, you're one to talk! And I'm not putting it off. I just don't like, wanna _freak her out,_ I guess. Even more than she already is. I'll tell her at some point... maybe." That just made Lammy's nerves spike up more. What would make her freak out? Katy almost always told her what was on her mind. What could possibly be so bad that she's avoiding it? The limitless possibilities made Lammy's head spin.

 Fortunately, her thoughts were interrupted when the familiar screech of a bus pulling up echoed behind her, and she jumped, not expecting it. Katy made a short, surprised noise, followed by the sound of her footsteps as she made her way to leave.

 "Oh, _crap-_ I almost forgot about the bus! I should jet."

 Lammy panicked, scrambling to leave the alleyway before Katy discovered her there, the grip on her helmet like steel to avoid accidentally dropping it. She made it to the front of the diner as fast as she could without making a racket. She tried to look casual, despite the fact that her breath came in thick puffs and her heart was thudding in her chest. It was a close call, as Katy and Sunny stepped out not a minute later.

 "Lammy?" Lammy stood up straight as Katy addressed her, giving her a small nervous wave and a smile. Like she hadn't just heard every bit of their conversation. Katy looked her up and down, tail twitching curiously and eyebrow raised. "What are you doing here? We weren't supposed to meet up till five..." She sounded surprised, but not unpleasantly so, which was a relief.  

 Lammy shrugged and looked away, doing her best to seem nonchalant. "W-well, I thought, you know, you don't like taking the bus, and- and since I'm going to your house anyway..." She glanced back for just a moment and noticed Sunny had the biggest grin on her face.

 "That's so sweet of you, Lammy! I'm sure Katy would love that," She exclaimed with hands clasped together. When Katy didn't say anything, she nudged her in the side with her elbow, and added sweetly, " _Right,_ Katy?"

 Katy blinked, almost looking... flustered? It happened for only a split second, before she was back to her normal, upbeat self again. "O-oh- Yeah! Thanks, Lammy, that'd be groovy."

 Sunny grinned even wider at her response, her hands moving behind her back, and it struck Lammy as weird. "Wow, I wish I had a gal pal like that," she hummed, and while her words made Lammy feel quite bashful despite her awkwardness, Katy only responded with a heavy eye roll. Sunny giggled, before turning to walk in the other direction. "I should let you go, then. See you later!"

 "Yeah, later, girl," replied Katy, sounding only a _little_ exasperated. Lammy furrowed her brow, watching Sunny leave. That was... Something?

 Hesitantly, she asked, "Wh... what was all that about?"

 Katy shook her head with a groan. "Oh, don't mind her. Sunny's just being weird."

 Lammy didn't know her well enough to say she wasn't like that all the time, so she just nodded. "Oh. O-okay. You, uh..." She held up her helmet nervously. "Wanna go home?"

 Katy smiled, and bumped up against her, and that single touch brought with it a heat that flowed through Lammy's body. For a moment, she completely forgot about what Sunny had said. "Yeah, I'd love that."

 The trip to Katy's house was uneventful. The roar of the engine made it hard to think, which Lammy welcomed- She was tired of her mind spiraling into the negatives. That was just another reason she liked riding so much.

 Once she'd parked, Katy let her arms slip from Lammys waist so she could go and unlock her apartment door. As they made the long hike up to the top floor, Katy adjusted her diner skirt and said "You know, I'll never understand how you get used to that."

 "What?" asked Lammy. "The motorcycle? I just... think it's kinda nice..." She didn't elaborate much more on that. She didn't really know how to. She followed Katy inside and let her shut the door behind them. Katy's apartment was somehow even more cramped than hers was- the floor had stacks of CD's littered everywhere, there was a growing clothing pile, and expensive appliances from when Katy had won that shopping spree a while back. This wasn't the first time Lammy had been here, but there were a few new posters on the wall. Katy seemed to be interested in something different every other week, and her apartment reflected that.

 "... Sorry it's kind of a mess," said Katy, setting down her things. She looked in her dresser for a change of clothes, since she was still in her diner uniform. "I was gonna clean up while I waited for you guys to get here, haha..."

 Lammy, after leaving her shoes at the door, found her way to the couch. She had to step over the litter, but she didn't really mind. "Oh, i-it's no big deal... mine's worse." She sat idly, staring at her knees as she waited for Katy to get dressed. She leaned slightly, reaching to pick up a CD off the floor to examine the case. It was one of _PIT's_ older albums, _Good Looking Guts._ The lead singer Christy Hart glared balefully up at her from the cover. _PIT_ definitely wasn't one of the bands she expected to be on Katy's top ten, especially not one of their more hard hitting albums, but Katy had always had a wide and weird range of musical tastes.

 "Have you heard that one?" Came Katy's voice, and Lammy looked up to find her leaning against the bathroom door in a fresh pair of pajamas. "That album feels like... getting put through a trash compactor, and coming out the other side thinking it was beautiful. It's _really_ good."

 "Y-yeah!" Bleated Lammy, and then, in an attempt to keep the conversation going, "I like... Christy's screaming."

 "Yeah, me too." Katy snickered, and Lammy mentally smacked herself in the teeth. Katy moved over to the couch, gesturing for Lammy to scootch over, and she quickly obliged. Katy plopped down with a happy groan, stretching herself out and wiggling into the cushions. This took a full minute. Eventually, Katy spoke up again. "Ma-san's gonna be here soon. Or, she should be."  

 Lammy knew why Ma-san was coming. She silently wished it could be put off for a little longer, but she knew that wasn't going to happen. Instead, she nodded. "Okay."

 There was a long pause. Lammy was dying internally. She knew exactly what Katy was going to say next.

 "So..." Katy began awkwardly, rubbing the back of her neck. "The Battle of the Bands... Still waiting on your answer on that."

 "I know," Lammy responded, faltering, eyes sliding to the floor, "I'm just not- I'm still... not sure about it." It was an over simplification, to be sure.

 Katy furrowed her brow. "You keep saying that. What aren't you sure about? If it's because you're not ready..." She moved closer, tilting her head. "Ma-san isn't here- it's just me. You can tell me what the problem is!" Lammy could feel she was getting frustrated already. That's what it had to be, right?

 She shook her head. She knew Katy wanted her to talk, but... "I-I can't- It's so stupid, Katy, it really is-"

 "It's not stupid if it's bothering you so much," Katy interrupted, putting a gentle hand to Lammy's chin. "I'm not gonna be mad, or make fun of you." She guided Lammy's face up, to look at her, and if Lammy hadn't been so frustrated with herself she might have blushed at the smile Katy had given her.

 "You remember how long it took for us to put on our first concert?"

 Lammy nodded, sniffing. She could already feel tears burning at her eyes. How was Katy going to take her seriously if she cried so much?

 "We waited until we were absolutely sure we could do it, and we _rocked the house."_ Katy didn't bring attention to the tears as she continued, her hand moving to Lammy's shoulder. "Sure, we were all late, but that didn't matter! It turned out great!"

 Lammy rubbed a fist to her eye, trying to clear away any budding tears. She could hardly look Katy in the eyes. "I know. B-but... I'm not- I'm not afraid of messing up! I just..." There was a deep sigh. This barely made any sense in her head- how was she going to explain it to Katy? "Y-you work so hard to get us noticed, and, you want us to be famous so bad... I-I'm scared we're gonna lose!" She blurted, finally, shoulders hunching up.

 "Lammy..." Katy began, but Lammy pulled herself back, trying to keep herself from clamming up again. It was all bubbling up to the surface, all of her anxiety and frustration and tears, streaking her cheeks and dampening her hands where they fell.

 "Y-you have so much faith in us! You're so sure that- that we have what it takes- I just, don't..." She brought her legs up to her stomach. She couldn't keep her voice steady. She sounded so ridiculous, her breath hitching and messing up her words. She hated this. "I d-don't want you to hate me. I d-don't want you to h-hate me if we can't win. I love this band so m-much... I just want to p-play with you, and M-Ma-san, I d-don't want anything to change!"

 There was a silence that hung in the air like a thick fog. Lammy couldn't see Katy's reaction- she didn't want to- she buried her head in her hands, afraid of what she would say, sure that Katy was regretting even wanting to know, regretting even letting such a wreck of a person into her b-

 Lammy brought her head up as she felt the arms wrap around her tightly, pulling her forward. Katy held her close against her chest, preventing her from curling in any more. "Oh, Lammy," she said, gently, and for a moment Lammy thought she could hear her breath catch as well, "Lammy, I would never- I'd _never_ be mad at you for something like that. Do you think that's all I care about?"

 Quietly, Lammy sniffled, and shook her head. Katy pulled back, to look Lammy in the eyes, and this time she didn't look away.

 "I want this- of course I want this. For _all_ of us. But there's so many other bands that want the same thing, and I know that if we did this, we'd only have a tiny chance. But it's still a chance- and there will be other chances, if we don't get this one." She smiled, and it put Lammy at ease, if only a little. "It's okay if you aren't comfortable now. I'm not gonna force you. I don't want you to do something you're not on board with, especially when it comes to this. This band is about having fun, and if we aren't giving them everything we've got, then what's the point?"

 "Y-you're right," Lammy mumbled, after a moment, and let her eyes fall back to her hands. Her fingers rubbed the fabric of her shirt in an attempt to do something with them. She didn't know why she thought this would go any different. Katy always seemed so patient with her. That was the only reason they managed to still be friends, after all.

 "I usually am," Katy snickered, and brought a hand to Lammy's face. It made Lammy jump, until she realized what Katy was doing. Gently, Katy brushed damp hair from her face, and with her thumb she rubbed away the last of her tears. "So... We don't have to enter the Battle of the Bands. When Ma-san gets here, I can tell her that something came up. And then... we can have a sleep over, the three of us. Does that sound okay?"

 Lammy sighed through her nose, and pressed her cheek into Katy's hand. The crying had given her a headache, and she was feeling tired, somehow, despite the fact that she'd only been awake four hours. But she was okay now. And she knew what she had to do.

 "...No."

 Katy rose an eyebrow. She clearly didn't expect that. "Huh?"

 "I- I want to enter the contest," explained Lammy, raising her head, regretfully, from Katy's hand, "I... I can do it."

 Katy blinked in surprise, frowning slightly. "L-Lammy, you don't have to do this because I want you too-"

 Lammy shook her head quickly, cutting her off. "No! N-no, It's not just because of you- I want to do it. I, I want to play onstage, w-with you, and Ma-san, and, and, and- I wanna win the Battle of the Bands." She gave Katy a small smile, despite the fact that she still looked quite a mess. "The three of us. We're M-Milkcan, right? W... We can do anything." It was a statement that she could barely bring herself to believe, but she knew Katy did.

 There was a long pause. And then... Katy grinned, a huge, heartwarming grin, and pulled Lammy into a tight hug. Lammy felt her body flood with warmth, only moreso when she heard a quiet rumble, and knew Katy was purring.

 "Heh, yeah. Yeah, Lammy, totally." Katy said into the crook of Lammy's shoulder, and there was a quiet sniff. Was she... crying?

 "T-thanks," mumbled Lammy, after a while of this, not really wanting it to end. It felt... nice. "Thanks for b-being so patient with me- I know I can be kind of dumb..."

 "You're not dumb." stated Katy, matter-of-factly. She pulled away again, letting her hands rest on Lammy' shoulders. "You're amazing, inside and out, even if you don't think so. You're my best friend, Lammy." Lammy blinked, blood rushing to her cheeks. _Best friend?_

 Before Lammy could properly process her words, there was a bang on the door, and they both jumped. Katy's tail poofed up to the size of a feather duster, her claws digging into Lammy's shoulders. It only hurt a little- Lammy was more focused on the noise than anything.

 "O-oh," Katy said sheepishly, looking at her clock, and slid off the couch. "It's five- that must be Ma-san." Lammy was just slightly disappointed, but she couldn't really put her finger on why. She shifted herself on the couch and twiddled her thumbs as Katy answered the door.

 "Hey, Ma-san! Come on in and sit down. Lammy's already here." Katy moved out of the way so Ma-san could enter and closed the door behind her. Absentmindedly, she put a hand to her chin. "I need... to find my laptop."

 Ma-san didn't say much except a noise of acknowledgement, brushing past Katy and hopping up on the couch next to Lammy. She looked over, eyebrow raised and arms crossed. Lammy felt her eyes on her and scrunched up slightly, rubbing the back of her neck.

 "You're here early."

 "Y-yeah, I, um... Gave Katy a ride." Replied Lammy, uncomfortably. She never really knew how to act around Ma-san- her emotions were even harder to read than everyone else's, and it didn't really help that the drummer always seemed to be annoyed by her. Her personality was so conflicting to Katy's, Lammy was amazed that the two were friends before they were a band.

 Lammy must have still looked awful from the earlier cryfest she had taken part in, because the next thing Ma-san mumbled was "You look like crap."

 "S-sorry," was all Lammy could seem to say in response to that.

 "... Bad choice of words," admitted Ma-san, scratching the back of her ear with her massive paw. "I mean- uh. Are you..." she made a gesture with her hand, trying to get something across, but whatever it was, Lammy had no clue.

 "... Y-yes?" came her hesitant reply.

 "Cool." Ma-san nodded her head, and the room simmered into an awkward silence until Katy returned with her laptop.

 "...Alright, gals n pals, here's what I found out." After settling herself on the floor, she plopped it down onto the coffee table and flipped it open. Immediately, the Battle of the Band's website popped into view. She clicked on a button in the upright corner, and a list of videos appeared, all of separate bands and a song they'd performed. She hovered her cursor over one of them as she explained. "Selection goes like this: basically, we need to record a video of us playing a song we wrote, and then we upload it to the site page. The judges, or the people running the contest, or whatever- they look through the videos and pick eight bands they like, and those bands go to the festival as performers..."

 Lammy listened intently, but nervously. She was, however, a little relieved that it sounded like they wouldn't be immediately judged in person. A rejection email probably wouldn't be so bad, right?

 "So far, all we need is recording equipment," Katy continued, leaning back against the couch. She furrowed her brow and tilted her head back further, looking at Lammy and Ma-san upside-down. "Do we know anyone with a camera?"

 Ma-san shrugged her shoulders. Lammy did the same, but internally. Katy frowned, deep in thought.

 "I think Parappa might have one. Or, Pinto, I guess?" She continued absentmindedly, scrolling through the videos. "I don't know. I'll figure something out. We can think organization tomorrow, since I have the next few days off." She clicked on one of them at random, and the video loaded slowly before showing three girls on stage. One was an alligator, one a gecko, and one a Komodo dragon.

 "We're the Limp Lizards!" Shouted the Gecko into the mic, and Ma-san immedeately snorted.

 "Oh, _my god."_

 Katy laughed. "Oh, this isn't even the worst band name I've seen."

 Lammy leaned forward, trying to watch the video over her friends snickering. The lead singer's lyrics warbled harshly into the mic, all screaming with no sort of melody to it.

_"My life is_

_a garbage heap_

_my life's full_

_of choking gas_

_since you left_

_my world's like_

_broken glass!"_

In the background, a turtle was smashing glass on stage. Lammy was starting to feel better about their odds here.

 Their night continued like that, the three of them cracking jokes or little comments about each band they watched. Lammy had nothing to input, but it was still nice. It helped that Katy and Ma-san seemed so sure about themselves.

 Eventually, as the hours dragged on, Lammy drifted off to sleep, with the thought that just maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long but also its huge so i hope you all like it?


	3. you're making me think way too hard

_Snap._  
  
_Snap snap._  
  
_Snap._  
  
_Snap snap snap._  
  
 Lammy snapped her fingers quietly as she waited for Katy to finish up her list. The list was important, she insisted, so that they could remember everything they had to do that day. Katy also insisted that it be _that_ day, because it was the only day all three of them were off- Saturday, when they usually had band practice.  
  
 Ma-san, who sat at the opposite end of the coffee table, legs dangling off the edge, drummed against the wood impatiently. Lammy had been trying to match the rhythm with her snaps for the past ten minutes, but Ma-san kept changing her pace, making it virtually impossible.  
  
 Their leader was largely quiet as she leaned over the coffee table. One hand carded through her blonde hair and the other scribbled hastily onto her list. Absentmindedly she jiggled her leg, not following either of the sounds in the air. Between them her tail twitched thoughtfully, tickling Lammy's thigh. It was a little distracting- making it slightly harder for Lammy to pay attention to Ma-san's drumming.  
  
 As she fell out of rhythm for the fifth time, Lammy decided this was a lost cause. Instead, she turned her full attention to the tail, which had batted her leg once again. It was _right there,_ and it looked so soft... Would Katy think it was weird if she just touched it? Probably. It didn't stop her from hovering her hand towards it anyway, ever so slowly...  
  
 "Okay. I think that's it!" Katy exclaimed, flopping back on the couch, making Lammy quickly jerk her hand back. Holding up the paper, Katy gave it one more once over before reading it off. "Okay- top priority is, obviously, getting the camera. I know for a fact PaRappa's little sister has one..."  
  
 Lammy quirked a brow at that. "Will she let us borrow it, though?"  
  
 "I mean, yeah, probably. How hard could it be?" Those were famous last words. Katy ignored the dubious expression Lammy gave her, continuing. "And we gotta find a place to film... I was thinking we just use Ma-san's garage like always and just fix it up so it looks more like a stage. Your dad's working all day like he usually is, right Ma-san?"  
  
 "7:30," clarified Ma-san, looking over her shoulder. Katy hummed and looked at her clock.  
  
 "It's 10:46 now, so that's..." She silently counted on her right hand, mouthing the numbers. "what, like eight hours? That's probably plenty of time." Lammy caught Ma-san's eye, and Ma-san gave her her own rather dubious look. Lammy silently agreed. Their track record with time wasn't the greatest, after all. "We gotta think of the song we wanna play, and- oh! Outfits, too."  
  
 Kicking her legs back and forth, Ma-san leaned back on her perch, considering it. "Fine, but I'm picking my own clothes," she conceded.  
  
 "Awh, what, you don't like my taste in fashion?" Katy pouted, pushing out her lower lip.  
  
 "No."  
  
 "What's wrong with our normal clothes?" Piped up Lammy, out of curiosity. She herself didn't mind if Katy picked out their outfits. It was much easier being told what to wear, anyway.  
  
 "Well, if we're gonna be a hit we gotta dress like it, right?" Katy explained, matter-of-factly. "Impressing the judges means we gotta look as good as we play. Maybe even better."  
  
 "I guess that makes sense..." admitted Lammy, and Katy beamed at her.  
  
 "Don't worry. I think I've got a pretty good look in mind for you already."  
  
 Something about the way Katy said that made Lammy's cheeks feel hot. "O-oh, yeah?"  
  
 "Do you even know what song we're gonna play?" Interrupted Ma-san, who probably had her priorities in order a little more than Katy did, anyway.  
  
 Katy indignantly straightened her list with the tiniest frown. "I was _getting_ to that." She cleared her throat. "I was thinking we could do the one we practiced last time. I don't wanna use anything off the CD... And we gotta use our own lyrics, definitely. We kind of played _Got To Move_ out already, and _Keep Your Head Up_ just wouldn't sound right without the percussion..."  
  
 It was still amazing to Lammy how Katy had managed to talk that marching band into playing with them. What were the odds that they would have been performing at the same time Major Minor was in town?  
  
 "Whatever," shrugged Ma-san, and Katy rose an eyebrow.  
  
 "You sure?"  
  
 "Does it matter?"  
  
 Katy frowned, and Lammy shifted a little uncomfortably.  
  
 "It would be _appreciated-"_  
  
 "What about, um-" Lammy broke in, but faltered once Katy and Ma-san turned to look at her. "The, uh, t-the one that goes..." she racked her brain for a way to describe it. Katy hadn't really given it a name yet- they tended to put that off until the last minute, like when the CDs were first being burned and they had to put track names on the back sleeve. Lammy could at least remember the tune in her head, though- so, in an attempt to get her idea across, she hummed it loud and clear.  
  
 Katy's ears perked up, recognizing the melody, and tilted her head. "The love song?" Lammy nodded. "W...why? I mean, I _know_ it's good, but-"  
  
 "Actually," interjected Ma-san, "Yeah, I'd be up for that." Lammy blinked, not really expecting _Ma-san_ of all people to be on her side.  
  
 "I-it's a nice song!" She assured after the moment of confusion, and Katy seemed genuinely surprised.  
  
"Uh, I mean. If you're sure, ahah." She looked away, rubbing her arm. "I wouldn't say it's my best work..."  
  
 "Duh," mumbled Ma-san. "We'd save your best for when we win."  
  
 Katy seemed to roll that in her mind for a few minutes, shooting a rather nervous looking glance at Lammy. Then she nodded. "Alright. Love song it is." Clapping her hands, she stood up, full of energy. "Okay! That's settled, now we just have to take care of everything else." She turned towards Ma-san. "Mar, since you're gonna be picking your own clothes, you can probably go home and start setting up. Your drum kit takes longer to put together anyway."  
  
 There was a shrug in return, and Ma-san hopped off of the table, stretching her arms. "Fine with me."  
  
 Then Katy turned to Lammy, hands on her hips. "Lammy, you can come with me. We can walk to PaRappa's house and get clothes on the way back. Then pick up my bass, your guitar, and then take your motorcycle over to Ma-san's house."  
  
 The influx of directions were overwhelming enough that Lammy hardly retained them. Despite this, she nodded, scratching the back of her head. "S-sounds great."  
  
 "Glad you think so! Now, let's get moving. We've got a lot of ground to cover."

* * *

  
  
 "This'll be a piece of cake. I'm _great_ with kids."  
  
 "I-if you say so..."  
  
 "The kid from that Baby Baby track loved me. He called me his _mom."_  
  
 "... He called me mom, too."  
  
 "That's not mutually exclusive, Lammy!"  
  
 Katy knocked on the big red door of PaRappa's dog house, a quick succession of three loud raps, and flashed Lammy a thumbs up. They waited for him to answer- or, more accurately, they waited until Katy got impatient and knocked again, louder this time.  
  
 "PaRappa, open up!" She hollered, loud enough that the whole neighborhood could have heard her. She tapped her foot, platform heel clacking loudly on the concrete. Finally, after a minute, the door creaked open and the sleepy, blinking face of PaRappa the Rappa poked out.  
  
 "Hu... Hey, Katy... What's up?" he yawned, rubbing his eyes. He was still wearing his pajamas, his nightcap drooping over his face. Lammy had to admit, it was kind of cute. He must have just woken up. He peered up at her from underneath his hat, gave her a wave, then looked back at Katy. "You doing a band thing? It's kinda early..."  
  
 "Oh, come on," retorted Katy, rolling her eyes. "It's only-" she took Lammy's arm to look at her watch. "11:34! Normal people would be up at this time."  
  
 Lammy had to admit, she almost _never_ woke up before noon if left to her own devices. PaRappa gave Katy a confused look, rubbing the back of his head. "Did you just come here to criticize my sleeping habits or what?"  
  
 Katy frowned. _"Actually,_ I was wondering if you had that old video camera lying around. We need it for a thing."  
  
 "A band thing though, right?"  
  
 "Yes, PaRappa, a band thing. We're shooting a video!" Katy stated proudly. "It's for the Rodney State Battle of the Bands."  
  
 That made PaRappa immediately perk up, and he moved inside enough that Lammy and Katy could pass through the doorway. "Oh, yeah! Me and PJ submitted a video for that a while ago- hold on, lemme get it-" He went into the back, leaving the two girls in the living room. Katy sighed, flopping over on the arm of the couch. She gave lammy an impatient upside-down pout.  
  
 "I _really_ hoped this would only take a few minutes..."  
  
 Lammy joined her, glancing over to where PaRappa had disappeared to. She rose an eyebrow. "I thought only rock bands were in the contest... d-does PaRappa know how to play rock?"  
  
 "No," said Katy, rolling her eyes. "He wouldn't know a genuine rockstar if they bit him right on the-" She paused, raising her head. It took a second before Lammy heard it, too.  
  
 "Pinto, come on, lemme see the camera! I gotta show Katy that video!"  
  
 "You said you wouldn't need it for anything else! It's my camera, dad _said_ so-"  
  
 Lammy looked down at Katy, brow furrowed in concern, but Katy only shrugged.  
  
 "I just need it for a second!"  
  
  _"You're gonna break it!"_  
  
 There was a thud, a yelp, and Pinto ran around the corner into the living room with the camera held up over her head like it would be out of PaRappa's reach. Then, she turned, noticing Lammy and Katy on the couch, and her eyes got as wide as dinner plates. "Oh! Katy! Hi!"  
  
 PaRappa groaned, rubbing the top of his head as he followed behind his sibling. "I was gonna show them the music video we made..."  
  
 "Hey, Pinto." said Katy, giving Pinto a kind smile and a wave. Lammy gave her a hesitant smile as well, despite not being addressed. She'd never met Pinto before- she wasn't surprised that the child hadn't said anything to her. She didn't get the happy wave Katy got- instead, Lammy received a curious head tilt. Thankfully Katy noticed this and added, "This is my friend Lammy. She plays the guitar!"  
  
 "Hi Lammy!"  
  
 "H-hi."  
  
 PaRappa hovered impatiently over Pinto's head and reached for the camcorder once again. "Pinto- the video-"  
  
  _"I_ can do it, _jeeze,"_ insisted Pinto, finding a spot on the couch between Lammy and Katy. She flipped the camcorder open and moved through the videos until she found the one PaRappa was talking about. She hit play, bouncing in place with a grin.  
  
 It was in an unusually empty Club Fun, and PaRappa stood at the mic.  
  
 "Okay, who's ready to rock?" He yelled, and it echoed around the empty room. There was a muffled hollering behind the camera that was clearly Pinto imitating a crowd.  
  
 "Yeah!" screamed PaRappa again. "Hit it, PJ!"

 Suddenly, PJ powerslid onto the stage, a güiro clasped tightly in his fist. He scraped the drumstick across the front rapidly as PaRappa began to rap.  
  
 Lammy felt like she had died and gone to hell for the second time. She grimaced and looked at Katy, who stared back at her, stone faced. PaRappa had his hands clasped, tail wagging. He was watching intently for their reactions.  
  
 The video ended, and the room was silent.  
  
 "What'd you think?" Asked PaRappa, a sparkle in his wide, innocent, loving eyes. Lammy looked back at Katy, hoping she would respond. Katy smiled tightly, and looked back at Lammy in a way that said, frankly, she did not want this sudden responsibility.  
  
 "Oh, it was... _Really_ good, PaRappa."  
  
 "You think so?"  
  
 "Oh, yeah, you'll get in the contest for sure!" Katy said, in the most disingenuous voice Lammy had ever heard in her entire 18 years of life. PaRappa seemed to fall for it, though, his tail only wagging faster.  
  
 "Yes!" He pumped his fist with a grin. "I was afraid the güiro was pushing it, but PJ insisted, you know?"  
  
 Lammy nodded her head. "E-experimental music is getting really big nowadays."  
  
 "Yeah, he said that too..."  
  
 "Now, uhm," cut in Katy, desperately trying to hurry this along, "You think we could borrow that camera so we could film _our_ video?" That blue tail was lashing side to side, and her foot tapped impatiently on the Rappa's plush carpet. Lammy seemed to be the only one who noticed.  
  
 Pinto pulled the camera close to her chest, a dubious frown on her stubby snout. "Oh... I dunno."  
  
 "We won't break it or anything. Promise!"  
  
 Silence. Pinto rolled the camera in her paws with a terse expression, obviously thinking it around in her mind. After a long while, she rose her nose in the air. "You can use it-"  
  
 "Oh, thank God-" gushed Katy, leaning for the camera, only to have it taken away.  
  
 "But!" continued Pinto, "I'm doing the filming. My pay rate is $30 an hour and I want snacks."  
  
_"E-excuse me?"_  
  
 "I'm saving my money to go to Film School," said Pinto, proudly. Katy opened and closed her mouth like a dying fish.  
  
 "I had to pay her too," added a sheepish Parappa.  
  
 "But- We just want the camera!"  
  
 Lammy, having been quiet for all of this, quickly thrust a hand into her pocket to grab her wallet. "I-it's a deal. I've got $30. W-will you... Be around at like, 6?"  
  
 Pinto grinned, took the money, and nodded.

* * *

  
  
 Lammy and Katy walked side by side, close enough to occasionally bump into each other. Lammy wasn't exactly sure where Katy was taking her next. She didn't really care- she was content to keep in step. As far as she saw it, Katy could probably talk her into following her anywhere. Something about her enthusiasm... It was contagious.  
  
 Katy was laughing, still on the topic of what happened in PaRappa's house.  
  
 "God, I feel bad for lying to him, but that song was awful," she had a smile on her face, despite the sentiment. "I just couldn't break his heart like that!"  
  
 "Do... Do they all sound like a _D.A.R.E._ instructional video?" asked Lammy, unable to keep herself from grinning along.  
  
 "His heart is in the right place!" Katy said, crossing her arms. "Lucky for us the best part about that video was the camera work." Lammy had to agree- Pinto wasn't bad at recording in the slightest. Katy's brisk pace slowed slightly, enough that Lammy almost ran into her. "Speaking of... Thanks again for covering that. It was super cool of you."  
  
 Lammy responded with a bashful shrug, eyes sliding to her shoes. "Oh, ah, i-it's no big deal. We're all doing our part, right?" It was probably the least she could do, especially with all the work the others were putting in.  
  
 "Oh, don't be so modest! It's still a huge help."  
  
 "Ah, eheh, well..."  
  
 The conversation trailed off into a rather comfortable silence, Lammy lagging behind Katy, eyes finding a spot on her lower back and staying there. She wasn't sure how long she'd spent staring at that swaying blue tail before she felt Katy's hand on her shoulder, stopping her.  
  
 "Hey, we're here!"  
  
 Lammy looked up. They had arrived at PaRappa Town's local flea market, large and bustling, vendors with their wares spilling out over tables or hanging up in racks. It was busy- but not overwhelmingly so, it already being the afternoon and no one wanting to sit out in the heat for long. Lammy sent a confused glance Katy's way.  
  
 "The Flea Market...?"  
  
 Katy crossed her arms. "Knock it all you want! I found my best styles here, and _cheap._ You just have to know what to look for. Come on, you trust me, don't you?"  
  
 "I- I mean, t-totally, but-" Lammy stumbled, but didn't get to finish before Katy had taken her hand and pulled her along.  
  
 "Then c'mon! We don't have all day!"  
  
 They passed through the front gate, brushing past groups of mingling strangers and tents. Katy seemed to know exactly where she was going, which was nice, because it was a lot bigger than what Lammy initially expected. It definitely made her appreciate the firm grip on her hand. Katy was saying something to her, but Lammy could barely focus on that and the many booths they passed. A few had caught her attention- particularly one headed by a tall mantis woman selling guitar parts- but none had managed to get more than a second glance before she was pulled away.  
  
 The smell of food consistently lingered in the air no matter what, and Lammy couldn't help but wonder if there were any small restaurants around. They hadn't eaten breakfast before Katy had rushed them out of the apartment, and she was starving.  
  
 "We can eat something after this," said Katy, as if reading her mind. Or maybe she just heard her stomach rumble. Lammy blushed.  
  
 "O-oh, cool. That would be nice..."  
  
 They had slowed to a stop again outside of a larger tent, soft reggae music echoing from a boom box in the back. A lanky frog man was sifting through boxes, singing along to himself, not having noticed them yet.  
  
 Katy relinquished her grip on Lammy's hand, and Lammy immediately wiped it off on her pants. She had to respect Katy for not bringing attention to how sweaty it was. Katy glanced back at her. "S-sorry," Lammy mumbled.  
  
 She laughed in response. "It's totally fine. It's hot out, right?" That wasn't the reason at all, but Lammy didn't dispute it and katy didn't prod any further. She turned, instead, towards the owner of the tent.  
  
 "Hey, Fleaswallow! You got customers!"  
  
 The man stood up straight and turned around, and his hat was tilted just enough for Lammy to see him squint at the two with his large, heavy eyes. When he spotted Katy, he grinned, putting his hands on his hips.  
  
 "Why, if it isn't my favorite funky cat. What brings you here today? You finally ready to sell me that bass, huh?" His voice was a deep croak, and it made Lammy sleepy just listening to it.  
  
 Katy huffed good naturedly, crossing her arms. "Nope. Still very much using it, actually."  
  
 "You sure? You could make _quite_ the pretty penny off a three string. They don't make them anymore, you know-"  
  
 "That's why I plan on keeping it!" Katy replied firmly. She put her hand on the front table. "C'mon, you know why I'm here."  
  
 Fleaswallow rose his hands in the air defensively. "Okay, okay. You know where the clothes are, come on in." He moved to let Katy inside, holding out his arm. Katy passed by, but Lammy stayed where she was, fingering her watch nervously. Her eyes flicked from table to table, looking at all of the trinkets and knick knacks. Fleaswallow rose an eyebrow at her, then leaned towards Katy.  
  
 "Who's the girlie with the bugged out eyes?" He whispered, though not quietly. Katy turned around, hands already hung with clothing.  
  
 "My guitarist," she replied proudly. She rose an arm, waving her cloth treasures like a flag. "Lammy, you can come inside. You gotta try some of this on!"  
  
 "R-right, okay." Lammy shuffled past Fleaswallow- ignoring the look her gave her- to Katy's side, who put down a pile of clothes on a nearby table.  
  
 "Careful with those," remarked Fleaswallow, resting against a stack of rolled up carpets. "They're vintage."  
  
 Katy leaned over to Lammy's ear, voice low. "That's what he says to hike the prices up."  
  
 "A man's gotta make a profit, you know. You and your dog friend are the most business I get nowadays."  
  
 Katy snorted and moved to pick up a white pair of jeans, handing them over to Lammy. "Here, hold these up to your waist. You're a 38, right?"

 Lammy nodded and obliged, wondering how Katy knew that. The pants were skinny jeans with holes in the knees, and seemed about the right size, if a little long.  
  
 She looked up to see Katy with her hand to her chin, contemplative. Lammy fidgeted with the belt loops nervously. "D-does this look okay...?"  
  
 Katy hummed in response, but Lammy couldn't tell if it was positive or negative. She picked up something else from the table, a leather jacket with one too many decorative zippers, and pressed it to Lammy's chest before turning back to the table. "Here, put this on and then hold the jeans."  
  
 Though she did as she was told, she immediately regretted it. The air in the tent was already thick, but the leather jacket only made it feel moreso. She pushed the sleeves to her elbows and bared the heat long enough for Katy to turn around again. When she did, she blinked, looking Lammy up and down.  
  
 "Woah. You look really hot."  
  
 Immediately, a blush flooded Lammy's cheeks and she let the pants droop as she scratched the back of her head bashfully. Hot? _Her?_ "Y-you think so...?"  
  
 "Yeah," affirmed Katy, concerned, and she reached over to slide the jacket back down Lammy's shoulders. "You're sweating bullets, girl. Maybe leather was a bad call..."  
  
 Lammy paused. She rubbed her hand against her forehead and realized that, yes, she definitely was sweating. "O-oh... Yeah." Putting the pants down, she flicked away the perspiration, feeling silly. Katy dug around in the boxes a little more, tail swishing back and forth. Lammy join her, moving to another box. She didn't search with the avid enthusiasm Katy did- but did anyone really get as excited about clothes as Katy?  
  
 She moved aside a few shirts, not seeing anything that really stuck out, until her hands felt something distinctly denim. When she pulled the fabric revealed itself to be a white jacket, cut above the waist with rose designs on the shoulders and another one on the back. Lammy felt like she'd seen this before...  
  
 And then it hit her.  
  
 "Hey, I've seen that jacket before..." came Katy's voice. It didn't surprise Lammy in the least- of course Katy knew this jacket.  
  
 "Carly Woodroe's jacket," bleated Lammy, her tail wagging excitedly. "From the cover of that one Orangegrove's album-" The one she listened to three times a day when she first bought it, that had scratches on the vinyl now but had sounded great at first.  
  
  _"Only the Truth?"_ finished Katy. She'd dropped the shirt she was holding. Her eyes were huge, like a cat that had seen a big juicy mouse, or- maybe a cat that had seen a really cool jacket. Lammy nodded quickly, forgetting the bad simile.  
  
 "I-it looks just like it, right?"  
  
 "Just like it or close enough," Katy replied, then leaned closer, lowering her voice to a whisper. "Don't say anything to Fleaswallow, or he'll totally raise the price. How much is it?"  
  
 Lammy checked the price, a small hang tag stapled to the collar. "Ten dollars..." She looked back up at Katy, wringing the fabric in her hands. "Y-you should try it on," she stammered, and thrusted it out. It was hard to get the words out- they were thick in her mouth. "Y-you'd look great!"  
  
 Katy's cheeks colored, hesitantly taking the jacket in her hands. "Oh- are you sure? I mean- _You_ found it..."  
  
 "Y-yeah!" exclaimed Lammy, a little loudly. She couched and tried to bring her voice to a lower decibel. "Carly did vocals and bass too- r-right? S-so it fits..."  
  
 Katy chuckled, but her eyes were cast down. "Yeah, eheh, I guess so..." After a moment she slipped the jacket over her shoulders, popping the collar up and pushing the sleeves to her elbows. It fit perfectly- not just in size, but in character, too.  
  
 "... Does the staring mean it looks good?"  
  
 Lammy blinked. She hadn't realized she'd been looking at her for so long. Quickly, to save face, she turned her gaze to the ground and scratched the back of her head. _How embarrassing..._ "O-oh... S-sorry. Yeah, it looks great."  
  
 "Good enough for a bunch of judges, right?" asked Katy, checking herself out in the mirror. She certainly looked happy, if her wide, toothy grin was any indication. The sight made Lammy's stomach flutter for just a moment.  
  
 "T-totally."  
  
 Katy didn't take the jacket off as she turned back to the box. "C'mon, we definitely gotta find you a _super_ cool outfit now. Maybe something that frees up those arms, like- oh! A vest, maybe, and-" She was pulling out clothes now, rapidly, tossing them to the side. "-a punk tank top, and those neat ripped jeans, and- boots!" She looked at Lammy, her hair a mess and a shine in her eyes. "You still have those steel toe boots?"  
  
 Lammy struggled to remember. "Uh, y-yeah, I think so..."  
  
 "We gotta make sure to pick those up. Here-" Katy tossed something to Lammy- a dark grey denim vest. "Try this one on. It'll be way more comfortable."  
  
 Lammy turned the vest around. There was a big fabric patch on the back, with a scratchy heart design painted in white. She wasn't really sure it fit her personality, but she slipped it on anyway. At least it was more breathable than the leather jacket. Katy watched her intently, then circled around, like she was sizing her up. "Yeah," she approved, arms crossed, "Now _that'_ s hot."  
  
 Lammy put a hand to her head to check if she was sweating again. Katy just laughed.  
  
 "No- no, I mean you look good in the vest."  
  
 Now Lammy really _was_ blushing. "O-oh. I- uh, heh..." Unable to respond properly, she instead got a glance of herself in the mirror. She supposed she looked a _little_ punk rock... But maybe it was just because Katy sounded so sure of herself. "I-if you say so..."  
  
 "I don't just say so- I _know_ so. Here-" Katy was beaming as she passed over a black tank top. "You should wear this underneath, and then like... Some bracelets to keep your arms from looking too bare. We look good now, but we'll look even better when we shoot the video."  
  
 Lammy held the tank top out to look at the words. _"B-Blood Kennel...?"_  
  
 "You know, that metal band from the seventies? I thought the design would match."  
  
 "I didn't think they had shirts..." The design on the front was an animalistic skull, with a body of tar. Lammy knew the band, of course. They were famous in the thrash metal scene and known for their band being made up of seven different guitarists and one person playing snare drums.  
  
 Katy bumped shoulders with her. "That's the cool thing about fleamarkets- you never know what'll turn up. I think we made out pretty good, huh?" She slipped off her jacket and grabbed another pair of pants she'd found, then hooked her arm around Lammy's. "C'mon, let's go pay for this."  
  
 It was starting to cool down by the time they had gotten lunch. The tents were slowly starting to pack up, and there were few people that weren't workers still hanging around.  
  
 "So, what'd you think?" asked Katy, mouth full of the burger she had bought from one of the stalls. She was eating quickly, already on her last bite. Lammy sifted through her garden salad at a much slower pace.  
  
 "I-It's a good salad," she replied earnestly, between bites. Katy snickered as she took a sip of lemonade.  
  
 "About the Fleamarket, Lammy. You've never been here before, right?"  
  
 Lammy swallowed. "Oh." She paused, thinking for a moment. "Well, t-there was a lot of homemade bongs..." There was a small choking noise, probably from Katy inhaling her drink as she laughed. Lammy couldn't help but smile. "I-it's a good Fleamarket."  
  
 "That's it though?" pushed Katy, once she'd composed herself again.  
  
 "A-and I saw some things that I thought were c-cool," Lammy elaborated quickly, "and I want to come back sometime, maybe, w-with you." The last part was important. There was no way Lammy would come here alone.  
  
 Katy seemed more than satisfied by that. "You should totally come with me next time, then! We didn't have much time today but I come here like, all the time." She leaned in, a smile on her face. "We can check out that guitar place, too."  
  
 "R-really?" Lammy was surprised Katy had even noticed. Had her staring been _that_ obvious?  
  
 Katy nodded. "That place is cool. They know a lot about guitars- you'd love it there. I'm actually glad that I got to bring you eventually, 'cause I think about you every time I pass that place." She had an embarrassed grin as she rubbed her arm. "They're probably tired of all the questions I ask about their Les Pauls."  
  
 There were butterflies in Lammy's stomach as she listened. It was a small thing, but the idea that Katy thought about her like that outside of the band made her feel warm inside. She was probably as red as the tomatoes in her food, so she looked down to try and hide it, feeling silly. "T-that'd be nice... I-I'd love that."  
  
 "Me, too," Katy responded. There was silence between them as Lammy finished her meal. Katy looked like she wanted to say something- she fiddled with her cellphone charms, eyebrows furrowed like she was thinking- but if she did she didn't act on it. It was strange. Maybe Lammy had made this awkward.  
  
 Eventually, once both of their glasses were empty, Katy stood. She was smiling again, and directed Lammy out of her chair. "It's almost five, we should probably get our stuff and head over to Ma-San's house."  
  
 Lammy blinked in surprise. Five already? It hadn't seemed that long while they were out... "Y-yeah, okay..."  
  
 The next half hour was spent walking back to Katy's apartment to get her bass and Lammy's motorcycle, then back to Lammy's apartment to pick up her guitar. It was a long process of back and forth. By the time they sped over to Ma-san's house PaRappa's car was already in the driveway.  
  
 The garage was open, and Ma-San was sitting on the stool of her drumset while Pinto was off to the side, doing the thing kids do where they have to look at every new little thing. PaRappa, leaning against his car, perked up when he saw Lammy and Katy arrive.  
  
 Katy let herself slide off the side of the motorcycle, titling her head at him as she went to fetch her bass out of Ma-San's sidecar. "You're here early."  
  
 PaRappa grinned sheepishly, scratching his ear. "Pinto wanted to get here early 'cause it's more professional."  
  
 "I'm checking the angles in this garage!" called Pinto, practicing pointing her camera at Ma-san, who looked slightly uncomfortable. Katy seemed impressed, raising an eyebrow.  
  
 "Jeeze. She's got her life more put together than I do. ...That's a little embarrassing." She carried her bass inside, and Lammy followed. The weight of her guitar in her hand made her feel better about this whole situation. Maybe they could pull this off after all.  
  
 "What's... what's with the kid?" Mumbled Ma-san as they passed. She was tapping her drumstick against the metal edge of the bass drum, brow furrowed. It was notable that she was in a wildly different outfit than usual- a black dress with straps crossed around the back, and her normal explosive head gear replaced with a little black pillbox hat. It looked good- Lammy was quite envious of the fact that she could dress herself so well with no outward direction.  
  
 "It was the only way we could get the camera," Katy hissed back behind her hand. "Just try to ignore her."  
  
 Ma-san huffed and focused on her drumset. "Whatever. Fine. Just don't let her touch anything."  
  
 Lammy turned and saw Pinto, looking innocently at the three of them with her big wide eyes. She gave her a nervous smile. Pinto responded by pointing the camera back.  
  
 Katy gave Ma-san a gentle pat on the back. "It'll be fine, Mar. She's a good kid." Ma-san didn't seem to accept the sentiment, but Katy was already hitching her case and the bag of clothes she brought on her back, looking over her shoulder at Lammy. "C'mon, lets get dressed and then we can do our sound test."  
  
 "How are you feeling?" asked Katy once they'd found a more private room. She had her back to Lammy, swapping her crop top out for one with horizontal stripes. Lammy kept her head pointed down as she shuffled into her outfit, too embarrassed about the situation to look up. It at least felt good to get into fresh clothes after all the walking in the hot sun  
  
 "I feel... P-pretty alright." It was an honest answer. She was as ready as she'd ever be- she just needed to get that guitar in her hands. Katy responded with a toothy grin and popped the collar up on her jacket.  
  
 "Groovy." She paused for a second, giving Lammy a contemplative look, then gestured with her hand. "C'mere for a sec, huh?"  
  
 "O-oh, uh... okay." Lammy followed immediately, and the small amount of confidence she'd had slipped through her fingers when she and Katy stood face to face. Katy placed a hand on her shoulder, guiding her forward until their boots were touching. Suddenly, Lammy was very aware of her own heartbeat. It thudded against her ribcage like a drum. "W-what's wrong?"  
  
 Katy was looking at her intently, and it only made Lammy more nervous. "Your lipstick's a little smudged," she finally answered, and turned to reach into her bag. Lammy let herself breathe once she looked away. This girl was going to kill her.  
  
 Finding what she was looking for, Katy held the tube of lipstick up with a smile. Lammy was surprised to see it- Katy never wore lipstick. "Here, lemme fix it for you. I keep a back up of that shade you always use just in case."  
  
 Too stunned to do anything but accept, Lammy let Katy take her chin in her hand and run the tube over her lips. Katy had her tongue stuck between her teeth thoughtfully, making sure to apply it with care. Her hands were warm, and Lammy couldn't force herself to pull away even if she wanted to.  
  
 It felt like an hour had passed by the time Katy was finished.  
  
 "And... There, all done." She pulled back to admire her work with a satisfactory smirk. "Now you're perfect."  
  
 "Th-thanks," breathed Lammy, though it was a wonder she could speak at all. She reached up to brush her now painted lips with her finger but a sharp tut from Katy made her still her hand.  
  
 "Hey, careful! If you smudge it I'll have to fix it again."  
  
 If Lammy was a braver person she would have smudged it just to see if that was a promise. She wasn't. Instead she followed Katy back to the garage in a shaken sort of silence, her arms and legs tingling.  
  
 "Okay, we're ready!" called Katy, "Everything set?"  
  
 "What took you so long?" grumbled Ma-san, reclining on her stool.

 "You can't rush perfection."  
  
 Ma-san rolled her eyes in response. "Go ahead with the mic check. Everything should be in place."  
  
 With slightly shaking hands Lammy moved over to her amp and plugged in her guitar. Sound checks were always an arduous process. Ma-san would fiddle with knobs while Katy and Lammy went back and forth on bass and guitar until she nodded her approval. It only made sense- Ma-san had the best ear for sound, and she was strict. She didn't let them go until they had her say-so. Once they were finished with the instruments they moved to mics, and Katy repeated the words "Check, one, two- go," over and over until it sounded like gibberish.  
  
 Pinto had her camera on the three of them the entire time. Lammy wasn't sure why she was recording the sound check, but she didn't ask. She kept the camera as steady and focused as herself.  
  
 Finally, after thirty minutes of this, Ma-san gave them a thumbs up and hopped back up on her drum set.  
  
 Katy nodded, stretched, and made sure the strap on her bass was secure before she turned to Pinto. "You ready, kid?"  
  
 Pinto gave an enthusiastic nod of her own, shifting the camera slightly. "Ready!"  
  
 "Okay!" Katy pulled the mic from its stand and spoke into it loud and clear, her voice echoing around the garage. "We are Milkcan," she exclaimed, gaze focused at the camera, "And we _rock the house!"_  
  
 Lammy steeled herself for her cue, guitar clasped firmly in her hand. Ma-san counted out the beat with her voice and drumsticks, a quick one-two-three, and then the song began. Lammy could feel the rhythm of it before she had even started playing, and it made her fingers itch against her strings. Katy was following up Ma-san's beat with her bass, low, quick chords, before she opened her mouth to sing.  
  
  _"I met this girl from out of town one day,_  
_her head was low, her spirit down,_  
_I couldn't bare to see her frown_  
_and so_  
_I followed her around,"_  
  
 Lammy began to play, echoing Katy's voice with her guitar perfectly. She could see the chords in her head as Katy sung them- even though they hadn't played this song in a while, she hadn't fallen out of practice.  
  
_"I hadn't ever seen anyone like her,_  
_she really set my heart on fire,_  
_being with her_  
_made me smile_  
_when I hadn't in a while,"_  
  
 Ma-san twirled her drum sticks in her large paws before hammering out the beat for the chorus, putting on a show for the camera. Pinto was making sure to focus on all of them, turning back and forth. Her tail wagged excitedly, betraying her professionalism.  
  
_"And she said-_  
_She likes the fast songs best_  
_now I think I like her too_  
_she's a hell of a girl_  
_I hope we meet again real soon_  
  
_and I was just so nervous then,_  
_but I thought of her the whole way home_  
_And I hope that she-_  
_I hope she thought of me too,"_  
  
 If Lammy wasn't glancing up at that exact moment, she would have missed Katy, whose mouth was on the mic but eyes on her. She grinned back and slammed a hard chord on her guitar, a few extra riffs that they hadn't practiced before but still falling in with the rhythm of the song. Katy rose her eyebrow in surprise, but, luckily, her hands caught up quickly and the beat stayed in its place.  
  
_"I met this girl from out of town again,_  
_my head was low, my spirit down,_  
_but she wouldn't let me frown_  
_and so,_  
_She followed me around,_  
  
_it was the look in her eyes_  
_it was the way that she had smiled_  
_and I thought of the girls_  
_that I've known_  
_and they seemed so long ago_  
  
_now I know- oh I know-_  
  
_that I like the fast songs best_  
_and I think she likes me too_  
_we like the fast songs best_  
_and we'll do whatever we wanna do_  
  
_and I couldn't find the words just then_  
_but I thought of her the whole way home_  
_And I know-_  
_I know that she thought of me too,"_  
   
 The song faded into its end. Lammy's heart was pounding in her chest, her fingertips felt electric. She tugged at the collar of her shirt to cool herself down and pulled her guitar strap over her head. Before she could put it away, she felt an arm around her waist. It was Katy, pulling her into a giddy half-hug, bumping her cheek into the side of Lammy's head.  
  
 "Lammy, that was amazing!" She gushed, and she was purring loudly, right into Lammy's ear. Lammy couldn't bring herself to mind in the slightest. "That improvisation- I didn't think you'd come up with that on the spot- it sounded even better than when we practiced!"  
  
 "I-it was nothing," Lammy stammered, her face hot, her body tingling for an entriely different reason now.  
  
 PaRappa, who had stayed for the performance, rushed over, tail wagging. "Nothing? It was incredible! You play guitar really good!" His voice dripped with sincerity, and it only made Lammy feel warmer. "You all sounded great- if me and PJ don't win, I totally hope you three do."  
  
 Katy giggled, giving Lammy a sly look. "Thanks PaRappa. I really appreciate that."  
  
 "Here's your video," cut in Pinto, who had removed her camcorder from its stand and was now bouncing in place, a mini-dvd disk on her outstretched finger. "You can edit out the parts you don't want on this- it's super duper easy."  
  
 Katy pulled away from Lammy's side and gingerly took it. "Thank you, Pinto," she said, and ruffled her hair. "You did a great job." Pinto beamed up at her.  
  
 "Thank you for the thirty dollars. I'll definitely put it to good use."  
  
 Putting the disk in a case Pinto provided, Katy quickly checked the time. "We made good time, too. It's almost time for Ma-san's dad to be home."  
  
 "Things are coming up Milkcan," chimed Ma-san, and Lammy could have sworn that was the most hopeful she's ever heard her.

* * *

  
  
 It was dark by the time Lammy had made it home. She'd dropped Katy off at her apartment, and Katy had given her another hug. She still thought about it as she laid there in bed, staring at the ceiling. She wished Katy was there with her now. She wished she could still hear that bubbly voice in her ear.  
  
 That was a fact she'd come to terms with a long time ago- and if she tried hard enough, she could ignore it. But recently it was almost impossible. Every little touch, every little gesture, every time Katy had even _looked_ at her made her heart buzz.  
  
 Her eyelids were heavy, but before she could fall asleep, her phone lit up. She pulled it over. Katy had sent her a text.  
  
_"thanx for everything today lammy!! you really rocked!!"_ it said. Even in text, Katy's words made her smile.  
  
 Lammy didn't think she could ignore this anymore, and with that thought, a feeling of dread overcame the butterflies that had settled in her stomach.


	4. the jerk of all trades

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an important b-story with everyones favorite goth sheep

 The lighter was empty. No matter how many times she rubbed her thumb against the flint, it clicked uselessly and the flame never popped. She gritted her teeth around her cigarette in frustration and threw the lighter to the side.  
  
 "...You look pissed."  
  
 Rammy rose her head from her hand and rolled the cigarette to the other side of her mouth. She looked at the woman in the couch opposite of her with a tight, impatient frown, leg bouncing, fingers tapping. "I'm jonesing, Kitty. Stupid lighter broke."  
  
 Kitty sighed and shifted on the couch, pulled a lighter from her pants pocket. She lobbed it over to Rammy who deftly caught it with a single hand, feeling super cool about herself for a second. She lit her cigarette and inhaled, leaning back in her chair, tilting her head to the stained popcorn ceiling.  
  
 This is what most days at Kitty's apartment were like- crashing on the couch and zoning out until she got her next gig playing guitar for some singer or another. Of course, Rammy had built up a pretty solid reputation in the Rodney State music scene as being the top name on every Do Not Hire list, and unless she felt like taking another trip back to hell to dredge up business, she was doing more of the former than the latter. She, as it was usually put, was unreliable, unprofessional, and in her opinion, incredibly unlucky. Cursed, maybe. It wasn't her fault. It definitely wasn't her lack of skill. She was amazing at guitar- she picked up songs frighteningly fast, played them even better than the original. No one strummed strings better than she did- it was the one thing she was proud of. It was an innate fact. And if the morons who rejected her couldn't see that, then as far as Rammy saw it, they didn't deserve to have her.  
  
 And until Kitty got sick of her and threw her on her ass, here she was. At the whims of the woman who, at the moment, was playing something from her laptop- loud and grating- a song, maybe, though Rammy wouldn't call it that. It made it really hard for her to stare blankly at the tv.  
  
 There was nothing on except news reports about the consequences of death being at an all time low- _Honestly,_ a handful of kids come back from the dead and everyone flips their shit. As far as Rammy saw it, she was doing that before it was cool. Just another thing Lammy stole from her.  
  
 Kitty had switched from the previous song to some noise band, the sound of breaking glass and wailing echoing out of the tinny speakers. Rammy put a hand to her head, taking another drag of her cigarette. She was on the verge of falling asleep when she heard it.  
  
 "We are Milkcan, and we _Rock the House!"  
  
_  Her eyes shot open, and she scrambled up, spilling ash on her front and onto the floor. She shoved Kitty to the side to see what she had pulled up. There was no way. _There was no fucking way.  
  
_  "Ow, what the hell?" hissed Kitty, but Rammy didn't acknowledge her. She was shaking, eyes glazed over in rage at the mirror of herself that greeted her from the screen, stupid grin and all. _What was with the vest?_ First she steals her job, now she has to steal her look, too?  
  
 "What the hell is this?" Rammy's grip on the couch was hard as she scrolled over the webpage, not wanting to give the knock off lamb's ugly mug one more look. The singer's voice still screeched over the speakers, some stupid love song that Rammy didn't even bother trying to take in.  
  
 Kitty smoothed her bristled tail, shooting Rammy a glare. "It's some kind of contest. I was watching the submitted videos- you could've just asked what I was looking at."  
  
 Rammy glared at the website header. "Battle of the Bands?"  
  
 "Uh... yeah." Kitty took back control of her laptop while Rammy breathed down her neck. "The winner gets a cash prize- and," her tone shifted, slightly more excited- "a record deal with Soul Sister Productions."  
  
 "Who?"  
  
 Kitty huffed. "You know. They produced those first three _PIT_ albums before Christy Hart went, like, crazy."  
  
 Rammy looked at Kitty, then back at the screen, then back at Lammy, the wheels turning in her head. "... Let's do it."  
  
 "H- what?"  
  
 "Let's enter the stupid contest."  
  
 Kitty blinked in surprise, staring Rammy up and down. "You really want to? I mean- this seems kind of sudden..."  
  
 "You write songs, don't you?" pushed Rammy, tilting the laptop closed so she could lean in. Kitty leaned back instinctively, eyebrows raised. "You wrote that one about some goth b-"  
  
 Kitty instantly fluffed up. "Th-that was a poem! Which is, you know, different. Why... why do you want to enter, anyway?"  
  
 Rammy almost told her that it was to shove her victory in the face of that two-bit knock off and her stupid hippie band, but thought better of it. The fact that she had gotten the better of her in the first place was _stupid,_ a mistake, and she didn't want Kitty knowing that. What would she think?  
  
 She finally answered, "The prize money, duh. It was like, what, ten thousand?"  
  
 "Right. Guess that was a stupid question," conceded Kitty, tail flicking back and forth. "Well. We wouldn't have much trouble I guess, a lot of those bands sucked anyway."  
  
 "I figured," snorted Rammy. "That one with the rapping sounded like hot garbage."  
  
 "I liked the güro. it was experimental and new. But yeah, the rapping was awful. And that Milkcan..."  
  
 "The guitarist sucked," Rammy broke in immediately. "And the singer does too."  
  
 Kitty blinked, then glanced back at the computer. Rammy would have been embarrassed about her sudden outburst if she hadn't felt so strongly about it. "Well, I mean. At least they have a drummer... if we're gonna enter we could use one- _every_ band has a drummer."  
  
 Simmering down, Rammy tapped the chair thoughtfully. Maybe she shouldn’t have rushed into this so fast… "Yeah, you're right, I guess. You got any friends that could do it?"  
  
 "If I did, don't you think you'd have met them by now?" questioned Kitty with an empty laugh, crossing her arms and leaning back in the chair. Her eyes looked over the screen in thought.  
  
 "Right," Rammy grinned, "Forgot I'm your only friend, dweeb."  
  
 "Mm. And people are busting the door down to be a part of your fan club, right?" Kitty had a smile in her voice as she said it, flicking Rammy's shoulder with her tail.  
  
 Rammy laughed a little, but then put a hand to her head. "God. We gotta get out more."  
  
 "We could try Carlslist," suggested Kitty, tilting her head.  
  
 "Ugh, we're probably gonna get, like, some creepy old geezer."  
  
 Kitty shrugged. "As long as he can play, who cares? He's not gonna hang out with us."  
  
 Groaning, Rammy pushed herself away from the chair. "I guess. I just don't wanna tarnish my image, you know? I can do that just fine by myself." She went to pick up her fallen cigarette, which had burnt itself out on the floor. She watched Kitty type as she re-lit the bud. "Y'know, tell them to send a picture or something."  
  
 "That might send out the wrong message, don't you think? Anyway, we can't really afford to be picky... the deadline for this is pretty soon. As in, like, less than a week soon."  
  
 Rammy grimaced and scratched the back of her head. "Fine. We'll take what we can get, then." She moved over to the table near Kitty's left, covered in papers and miscellaneous garbage. She noticed one with writing on it- it looked like one of Kitty's poems. She had a habit of throwing them around. "We could probably translate this into song lyrics, right? Doesn't have to be anything insanely meaningful."  
  
 Kitty's ears flattened back nervously as she looked up to see what Rammy had in her hands. "Oh, uh- Maybe not-"  
  
_"I wanna be your kitten, caress my fur,"_ Rammy read, then rose an eyebrow at Kitty. _"Suffocate me with a whisper... hear me purr?_ Shit, dude."  
  
 Kitty looked away, visibly heated. Her tail poofed at the end as she wrung it in her hands. "That's, that's just..."  
  
 Rammy put the paper back down. The prose was fine, a little sappy- but it wasn't what she was looking for. "We definitely ain't using that one." She shifted the papers, looking for something else. "We need something, like- Cool. We gotta show people how much ass we kick. I mean, love songs are for suckers, right, Kitty? We're better than that."  
  
 Kitty was quiet for a moment, reaching over to pick up the discarded paper. "Yeah, totally."  
  
 "We should find you something you can scream- like, you know, you do that sometimes at those slam poetry jams. You got a voice made for screaming."  
  
 One of Kitty's ears flitted up. "You... you think so? I just- you know, think it sounds more genuine..."  
  
 Grinning, Rammy nudged Kitty in the arm with a fist. "For sure. It'll be just like- like Christy Hart."  
  
 Kitty sunk in her chair, going back to what she was typing, but Rammy saw the small smile on her face. Satisfied that she’d gotten Kitty back on her side, Rammy went back to the pile of papers, shuffling through them, skimming the text briefly for anything they could use. Most of it was sad, venting prose. Some romantic- a few of them even made Rammy's cheeks heat up. She certainly had an imagination… but none of it was what Rammy was looking for. She wanted Lammy quaking in her junky knock-off sneakers.  
  
 It was only until she reached the bottom of the pile that she found it- the writing was scratchy, less put together than the others, like it was in a hurry. And it was _perfect.  
  
_  Kitty glanced over for a moment, then took a second look, eyebrow raised. "Oh, that one's pretty old..."  
  
 "No," responded Rammy, grinning wide, like all of her prayers had been answered. "No, this is great. We're gonna use this one."  
  
 Kitty chewed on her bottom lip for a moment, pensively, then took the paper from Rammy's hands. "At least let me refine it, alright? It could use some work."  
  
 Rammy rolled her eyes, but let her have it. "If you say so. Just make sure you leave in the bits about cutting people."  
  
 "Oh, of course." Slipping the paper away, Kitty finished up what she was working on and turned her laptop towards Rammy. "There. Carlslist Ad is up. Hopefully we'll get someone fast."  
  
 Humming her acknowledgment, Rammy skimmed the page. Kitty opted out of asking for a picture, which she was sure would come to bite them in the ass. Well. Whatever. She was good enough to carry any shortcomings they had.  
  
 Tabbing back over to the band page, Rammy scanned over their competition. Other than Milkcan she didn't recognize anyone- except _Mascara Masque and the Spectres_ , a post-punk sonic experimentation band that played in their area. They had a good sound... and they might be a problem later. Fortunately their guitarist sucked. Another group, _Dazed N' Confused_ , looked interesting, until Rammy actually clicked the video and discovered they were a metal/bluegrass fusion band.  
  
 She scrunched her nose as the lead singer, a raggedy opossum man, howled into the mic. "Are you kidding me? Is this like, folk punk?"  
  
 "Those guys aren't bad," Kitty commented, foot propped lazily on the living room table. "I like their existentially depressing lyrics. Sounds kind of nice against the upbeat sound. Also, they call it _Thrashgrass."  
  
_  "More like _Thrashass_ ," mumbled Rammy under her breath. Kitty flicked her ear.  
  
 "Watch it, or I'll thrash _your_ ass," she warned, but her words were harsher than her tone. Rammy grinned and leaned close, almost challenging her to own up to the threat.  
  
 "Do it, then."  
  
 "...Maybe after I finish these lyrics." That must have taken Kitty off guard, because she went silent after that, returning to her work. She always had a habit of taking things too seriously- well, whatever. That was her issue, and Rammy was content to go back to the computer. Only one more band looked any good- _Weird Autumn,_ fronted by a large bear with a strong, heavy voice- but any credibility it gave him was taken away by the fact that he dressed like somebody's grandpa.  
  
 "Christ," remarked Rammy, once the video ended, "They have a cat bassist too. What's up with that?"  
  
 Kitty didn't look up. "What do you mean?"  
  
 "You, that chick from Milkcan, and now this one, here-" Rammy turned the screen to prove her point, jabbing a finger at the dark feline in the back.  
  
 "Maybe it's because we... like fish so much," came her reply, quietly. It took Rammy a few seconds to understand what she meant, and when it clicked, she groaned loudly and slapped the laptop closed.  
  
 "Honestly? If death weren't fake I'd murder you for real right now."  
  
 Kitty scrunched up in her chair, pulling her papers close. "It's okay, I wanted to kill myself as soon as I said it."  
  
 "Now you have to live with it for the rest of your life."  
  
 "Or maybe more."  
  
 "God, that's true. I guess you'll have to live forever knowing what a horrible and bad joke you made."  
  
 Kitty grinned. "I guess you'll just have to put up with my horrible and bad jokes for the rest of time, too."  
  
 "Oh no," Rammy moaned in exaggerated sadness, throwing her head back against the couch. "What a problem."  
  
 Their jokes went back and forth for a while, eventually settling down long enough for Rammy's eyes to get droopy. She wasn't sure when she had fallen asleep, but the next thing she woke up to was Kitty pawing at her shoulder.  
  
 "Rammy," she said, "Rammy! We got a reply!"  
  
 There was something wet dripping down Rammy's chin as she jerked her head up. She blinked sleepily and rubbed her palm across her cheek, smearing the drool into her fur. "Augh... What? What... time is it...?"  
  
 "4:47," came the hurried reply, "but that doesn't matter. Someone responded to the Carlslist ad." Kitty had plopped herself next to Rammy, laptop open and bright, searing Rammy's pupils. "She said she wants to meet up with us today at uh..." She squinted, re-reading the text. "Magneta Lane."  
  
 Rammy groaned. That was a lot to take in at once. Who was responding to Carlslist ads at 4am anyway? Sitting up, she noticed she was covered in a blanket. She pushed it aside to lean towards the screen. "Magneta Lane? Isn't that some shitty dive bar?"  
  
 "I mean... I've only been there a few times. It's not... super bad?"  
  
 "It's not super bad by _your_ standards or it's not super bad by _normal_ standards?"  
  
 Kitty grimaced at that, tail twitching. "Okay, yeah, it super blows. But whatever, right? It's temporary, and besides- if this drummer's as good as she says, then we're pretty set." Rammy supposed she was right. It would all be worth it in the end, to even get a taste of showing that stupid sheep who the real boss is. Just thinking about it was enough to get her blood boiling. Enough to make her forget how hasty this plan was- if she could even touch her, see her face to face again... Her fingers dug into her pant leg. That concert with Teriyaki Yoko was her last chance to finally _be_ somebody, even if that somebody was a corpse-walking coal-shoveling guitarist trapped in hell. It was the only thing she was good at. Why did Lammy have to take that from her? She didn't even want it, she didn't even-  
  
 "Rammy? You... You _do_ wanna meet up with her, right?"  
  
 Blinking, Rammy let her hand relax. She looked up at Kitty, whose brow was quirked, clearly worried- or maybe she was just weirded out. "Huh? Fucking- yeah. Yeah, we're doing this."  
  
 Kitty tilted her head, brushing her hair away from her eyes. She leaned down a little to meet at face-level with Rammy, which was slightly uncomfortable. She had a hard time looking her in the eye. It felt like she was seeing inside of her, like she knew her very soul. "You look really tired," she said, finally. "Maybe you should go back to sleep."  
  
 "Says you!" retorted Rammy almost immediately, trying to save face. "What are you still doing awake, anyway?" Kitty quickly glanced down, her hair falling back into her face.  
  
 "I was just finishing up those lyrics. Once I got started it was kind of hard to stop."  
  
 Frowning, Rammy moved a hand to push the hair away again. The bags under Kitty's eyes were large and deep, had been like that since she'd known her. "Christ. Do you ever sleep? I can't even remember seeing you do it."  
  
 "I don't need to sleep as long as you do!" Kitty hastily replied, though she didn't pull away from Rammy's hand. "Our systems work differently. I just do it when you aren't paying attention is all." Rammy scoffed and let herself lean back on the couch.  
  
 "Sure. Just don't be passing out on me any time soon."  
  
 “Whatever. You should be more worried about yourself, you know. Maybe you should set an alarm so you don’t oversleep.” Kitty had gotten up from her spot on the couch, presumably to go to bed herself. Rammy brushed her off and closed her eyes, irritated at the comment. She wasn’t wrong. Oversleeping was one of the biggest reasons she missed her gigs. Still, it pissed her off to be lectured about it, so she ignored her. Despite this, before she left, Rammy felt Kitty pull the blankets back up to her chest, clicking her tongue. “Christ. I can’t believe I let you talk me into all this...“  


* * *

  
  
 Music pulsed and voices carried in the roomy bar of Magneta Lane, making it hard for Rammy to think straight. Normally this wasn't a problem, but right now, it was way too much. She had to stifle a scream when someone accidentally bumped into her, and thought that for now, it would be best to stick by Kitty's side. Kitty herself didn't look much better, but she seemed to straighten up a little when Rammy caught up to meet her.

  
 "This place fucking blows," Rammy commented sourly, arms hunched and hands in her pockets. "Where's this chick we were supposed to meet?"  
  
 "I-I, um..." Kitty's tail was lashing side to side, her ears flat against her head. She tried to look over the crowd- she at least had the height advantage- but she seemed almost as lost as Rammy was. "Just- hold on. Let me..." She moved through the people enough to press against a wall, and searched in her pocket for her phone.  
  
 Rammy was patient enough to wait while she called their absent drummer. Her leg bounced, forcing herself to focus on something, trying to at least make sense of the band playing on center stage. Did the people here have _any_ respect for music? Why bother hiring a band at all if it could barely be heard? That just made Rammy's skin itch even more.  
  
 "Hey. Where are you-" Kitty paused, frowned. After putting a hand to her free ear, and raising her voice, she continued. "It's Kitty! You didn't save my... Where are _you_ at? We're at the club, we can't see you."  
  
 Another pause. Rammy continued to jiggle her leg, looking at the floor. Somewhere close to her she felt someone stop and lean by the wall. She looked at Kitty, fur bristling.  
  
 "Hey," said a deep voice, to her right, she knew whoever it was was leaning close to be heard over the noise. "I haven't seen you around befo-"  
  
 Rammy quickly interrupted. "Screw off," she spat, not pulling her eyes away. Taking the hint, the perpetrator rose their hands in an understanding gesture and pushed away from the wall, disappearing back into the crowd. "The nerve of these losers," Rammy muttered to herself, then, turning to Kitty, "She here or what? I wanna get the hell out of dodge."  
  
 Kitty's ears flattened against her head as she stuffed her phone back into her pocket. "Trust me, I don't like it any more than you do." She slunk closer, hooking an arm around Rammy's, and gently tugged her forward. "C'mon, she said she was by that neon guitar sign."  
  
 Looking up, Rammy saw what she was talking about- and huffed. It was on the exact opposite of the building. Kitty had to practically drag her through the crowd, shuffling between groups awkwardly. Everyone was tightly packed together, like a can of sardines, and the smell of so many grinding bodies wasn't much better. Kitty's tight grip on her arm was enough to keep her from getting sucked in, but it definitely didn't keep her from snagging on people’s various limbs.  
  
 "This sucks," she said again, just loud enough to be heard over the noise.  
  
 "Why do you keep complaining?" Kitty called back, looking over her shoulder, brow furrowed. "This was your idea." Rammy knew she was right, so she closed her mouth and continued to follow until they finally popped out on the other side of the room. The tables along the walls were significantly less populated; only a few people, but no one that really stood out-  
  
 "Hey, are you, uh... Ma-sin?"  
  
 Rammy jerked her head back to Kitty, who had been addressing someone she didn't really catch sight of until she'd shifted to the right. They were a short, grey furred creature, wearing a black dress and- _oh._ "Oh, you've got to be fucking _kidding_ me."  
  
 'Ma-sin' looked up from the book she had on her lap, an expression of thorough boredom on her face. She sat up and took her feet off the table. "You're the ones who needed a drummer, right?" She asked, her tone flat. She looked up at Rammy and rose a thick eyebrow. "What's _your_ problem?"  
  
 Rammy scratched the back of her head. "I didn't- I didn't think she'd be a mouse," she muttered to Kitty.  
  
 Kitty's face scrunched up in confusion. "Wh-what does that matter?"  
  
 "Maybe she's worried you'll eat me," snarked Ma-sin, tapping the table with her fingers. Kitty's tail poofed up immediately, but before she could protest the mouse continued. "Look, I don't need this gig. I'm bored. I have time on my hands; You're the ones that seem desperate."  
  
 Rammy sputtered, face heating up. "Hey, we're not-!" One look at Kitty's disapproving expression made her rethink her approach, and she caught her tongue between her teeth for a moment, thinking over her response. "Look. We need to have a song ready in five days. Can you, like, come up with a back beat for us?"  
  
 "You're kidding me," Ma-sin's head was in her hand. She didn't seem fazed in the slightest. "I could come up with a good beat in less than an hour. You got something harder?"  
  
 "If we make it past the judgement process," explained Kitty, "then we'll be going to the Battle of the Bands in Greenville. We'll have to prepare three more songs for it, so-"  
  
 "You'd need me to practice those with you too."  
  
 Kitty nodded.  
  
 “And what am I getting out of this?”  
  
 Rammy scoffed. “The hell do you mean ‘what are you getting?’ You’re working free lance.”  
  
 “Like hell I am,” came Ma-sin’s cold reply, slapping her book closed. “You think you’re gonna split with that prize money, you got another thing coming.”  
  
 “Hey, hey-!” Kitty put an arm in front of Rammy, pulling her back, and Rammy snorted. “Of course we’re paying you,” she assured, glaring down at her from the corner of her eye. “If we win-”  
  
 “ _When_ we win,” corrected Rammy, arms crossed.  
  
 “... When we win,” sighed Kitty, “then we’ll split the prize money evenly. Which means… $3,500 for you?”  
  
 After a short moment of thought, Ma-sin nodded. "Fine. Then I'm on board. “She rolled her shoulders. "And if you don't get picked, then just know that it won't be because of _my_ drum skills." Rammy almost missed the glance in her direction, but she didn't.  
  
 Suppressing her impulsive thought of ramming her horns straight into the arrogant mouse, she slapped an open palm onto the table instead. "We don't even know what you sound like!" she barked, blood boiling, "How do we even know you're good enough? Sounds like a lot of talk that you can't back up, squirt." She punctuated her insult with a finger to Ma-sin's chest. It was a lot harder than she expected. _What was she, pure muscle?_  
  
 Ma-sin didn't flinch. She didn't even seem mad. "Fine, then. If that's what you want, then I can show you." She slid off the table, and it was then that Rammy noticed that the band that had been playing wasn't on stage anymore. Standing on her toes she could only barely see where Ma-sin had dipped out at.  
  
 "Kitty," she grunted, tugging at the hem of Kitty's jacket, "you're taller than I am. Where'd that rat go?"  
  
 "Ugh."  
  
 Rammy looked up, abashed, to see her pinching the bridge of her nose. "What?"  
  
 "Did you really have to yell at her like that?"  
  
 "She started it!" exclaimed Rammy in disbelief. "How are you siding with McFisty over _me?"_  
  
 "I'm not siding with anyone!" asserted Kitty. Her tail was curled around her leg, twitching nervously. "But she was the only one who responded to the ad. Do we really have time to be picky?"  
  
 "I mean, no, but-"  
  
 "Then we gotta work with what we have!"  
  
 "But she basically said we sucked!"  
  
 "We don't even know if we suck yet."  
  
_"I_ don't suck."  
  
 Kitty sighed, running a hand through her hair. "Whatever. That doesn't matter, we need to find her again or we won't have a band."  
  
 There was a riff from the stage, interrupting Rammy before she could respond. Her ear twitched and she turned to focus her gaze to the new band performing.  
  
 "Oh- wait, is that..."  
  
 There, straight in the center, was Ma-sin. Her drum kit was massive, bigger than anything Rammy had ever seen before. She twirled her drumsticks between her fingers effortlessly, then brought them together over her head, counting- one, two, three.  
  
 “We are Saturn Stratosphere,” came a breathy voice from the speakers, “Relax, have a seat, and let us soothe you.”  
  
 And then the band started to play.  
  
 The lead singer’s words must have been ironic. The music was loud, finally able to drown out the crowd around them. To the left of Ma-sin was an octopus who played not one, but two guitars, one electric and one bass, which Rammy found odd; they had to make use of the arm gimmick somehow, though, she supposed. The singer, a willowy, drooping orchid flora playing a keyboard, had a strange cadence to their voice that Rammy couldn't decide if she liked or absolutely hated.  
  
 The thing that drew it all together, however, was Ma-sin's drumming. She trashed her drum kit hard- hard enough that it seemed she might break it- but managed to somehow match the rest of the band perfectly, tying together their collective sounds.  
  
 She didn't realize her jaw was hanging open until Kitty closed it for her.  
  
 "... So, did I find us a good drummer?" coaxed Kitty. Rammy could feel her grin and the breath against her ear.  
  
 "I mean... She's okay, I guess."  
  
 They sat and listened to the band for what felt like hours. They had played at least ten songs, all different, all with lyrics Rammy could hardly understand. Was the flora talking in a different language? She couldn’t even bring herself to ask Kitty, who seemed completely spaced out. The only thing moving was her tail underneath the table.  
  
 "I figured you'd want a live example," Ma-sin explained after the band had left the stage, "which is why I had you meet me here when I had a gig. So?"  
  
 They answered in unison. "I-it was great!" blurted Kitty quickly, but Rammy had no intention of letting Ma-sin feel smug.  
  
 "It was... fine."  
  
 Rammy immediately felt a sharp pinch at her side and recoiled, eyes shooting to look at Kitty. She didn't look back at her. "...So, I guess you'll be our drummer for the battle of the bands," Rammy conceded, rubbing the sore spot with her hand. "We gotta get this shit started as early as possible, so come to, uh..." She thought for a moment. "We'll practice at that busted down shopping mall down the road. Be there at like, 7?"  
  
 "Isn't that place full of snakes?" whispered Kitty.  
  
 "God I hope so."  
  
 Ma-sin nodded and moved to shake Rammy's hand in agreement. "I'll be there." Her grip was crushing, but her expression didn’t move. Rammy only winced when she left.   
  
_Creepy fuck._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shout out to my pal riley for helpin me write out with the beginning of this newest chapter (^:


	5. i think they have a word for it (i think they call it apathetic)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AGAIN sorry for the long wait of this one... i have a hard time with writing so thank you all for being patient with me, haha. as thanks for waiting, i wrote a small [supplementary story](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12648603) about how Rammy and Kitty met, so please check that out!
> 
> AND ALSO another very special shoutout to my friend riley for coming up with some great dialogue for this chapter!

"You seriously never sleep, do you?"   
  
Kitty locked eyes with Rammy as soon as she spoke, hand pausing on her bass. "Sorry. Did I wake you up?" she asked, sheepish, before leaning the instrument against the arm of her chair.   
  
"It's a one room apartment. Kind of hard not to hear you." Rammy lifted herself from the couch, the bones in her back popping loudly. She hissed and stretched, trying to straighten herself out. Maybe next time she went back to hell she'd opt for something that was easier on her spine. "...What're you doing?" she questioned, gesturing to Kitty’s bass.   
  
Kitty shrugged. "I'm a little rusty. I was trying to practice before we actually, you know, got into it."   
  
"Well, don't let me stop you," Rammy replied, moving to light a cigarette. She took a deep drag and flicked it into an empty cup.   
  
"You sure?"   
  
"Who needs sleep, right? Screw it."   
  
Kitty let out a sharp laugh through her nose. "Right."   
  
Leaving her to her bass, Rammy searched through the apartment to find her own instrument. If Kitty was practicing, she supposed, why shouldn't she? Now that she thought of it, they'd never actually played together. The only times she'd seen Kitty perform were during her weird poetry nights, and even then, it was far and inbetween. Still, even from that, Kitty seemed far from awful. If they could just pull this off…   
  
"Should you be smoking after just waking up like that?" commented Kitty. She was still hovering over her bass, like she was too embarrassed to play now that Rammy was awake.   
  
"What's the worst it could do? Kill me?" she snarked back. After pulling her guitar from its case, she strode back over to the couch and plopped down. The thing definitely needed tuning; it had gotten pretty banged up during her last show.   
  
"Got me there,” Kitty snickered, and she held her hand out to Rammy, curling her fingers. "Gimmie a hit, huh?"   
  
Rammy blew smoke through nose, hesitant, but thought better of it and passed the cigarette over. "So what are you thinking for this? The song, I mean."   
  
Kitty shook her head, and after taking a long drag, gave Rammy her cigarette back. Rammy frowned at it; she’d nearly smoked the whole thing. "I want, like... a clash of sound. Think like, maybe, early _Spacebabes?"_ She picked up her bass, plucking some strings. "Then I could do something low to follow up behind you."   
  
"Why don't we plug in the amps?" asked Rammy. She had a basic idea, but if she could demonstrate it for Kitty...   
  
"Are you kidding?" Kitty shook her head immediately. "That's way too loud- we live in an apartment!"   
  
"Yeah, a shitty mold infested apartment. I'm pretty sure the people above us sell drugs," replied Rammy nonchalantly. She was already plugging her guitar in, pulling the strap over her head. "They probably hear worse every day. In fact, I bet they'll _thank_ us for bringing music into their otherwise sad, pathetic lives." She waved the plug of Kitty's dusty amp with a grin. _"C'mon._ We've never played together before. I wanna know how we sound!"   
  
It didn't take much to convince her. After a minute of protest Kitty sighed and slid out of her chair, dragging her bass with her. Snatching the cord from Rammy's hand, she peered at her from the corner of her eye. "Just remember to play _quietly."_   
  
And Rammy complied, at first. They played a few simple chords, experimenting back and forth. Kitty was good- even better when connected to the amp- and Rammy was able to follow along easily. It only made her more confident- if they sounded this good now, how much better would they be later, when they had Ma-Sin?   
  
Good enough to beat Milkcan, at this rate. There was no doubt in her mind.   
  
Slowly, they built a song together, fast-paced and hard hitting, a constant calamitous rhythm. All they needed was the drums.   
  
Kitty muttered her lyrics under her breath, changing the inflection to fit the beat, stringing together the melody.   
  
She paused, strumming quietly again, and then, when she was finally sure of herself, she screamed her song. Her words echoed around the small apartment, clear over their instruments. She hardly even needed a mic. Rammy grinned, watching her, slamming down on her strings with just as much passion. She could almost hear the crowd below, chanting their names, stomping along to the beat...   
  
They were so distracted that they initially hadn't heard the pounding on the door. Kitty was the first to drop her guitar, eyes wide and ears twitching. They both exchanged nervous glances, waiting for the other to answer the door.   
  
"I should... I should probably get that, huh?" asked Kitty, finally, already freeing herself from her guitar strap. Rammy nodded unhelpfully. Her heart was hammering in her chest, still high from their performance. She watched Kitty frantically straighten herself out before opening the door.   
  
"H-hello, uh, officer!" Rammy couldn't see past Kitty until she leaned over. Standing in the doorway was a tall human man, a police officer, a stern expression on his face. "Is there an issue?"   
  
"We got a noise complaint about your apartment," he stated, voice gruff, "You girls realize what time it is? I could hear you a block away!" Rammy rolled her eyes. Obviously that was the _point._ What, could nobody invest in some ear plugs?   
  
Kitty's ears were flat against her head. "Sorry about that. We'll turn it down."   
  
The policeman grunted. "That's fine. I'll let you off with a warning." There was a staunch pause. "Don't let it happen again, or I'll issue you a citation."   
  
"Y-yes sir."   
  
He leaned in the door a little, making eye contact with the guitarist sitting on the couch. Rammy glowered at him, plucking her strings in quiet rebellion. "You girls have a nice, _quiet_ night."   
  
Rammy rolled her eyes and waved him away. "Yeah. Whatever. Bye."   
  
Kitty closed the door before anything else could be said. Her nervous disposition was gone almost as soon as she had turned around, and the toothy grin on her lips took Rammy completely by surprise. "That... that was amazing! I can't believe we just-" she clapped her hands, locking her fingers together, "-came together like that! It still needs some fine tuning, obviously, but... oh man, we have to write this down-" she snatched up a pad of paper and hurriedly worked out their chord progression, tongue caught thoughtfully between her teeth.   
  
Rammy couldn't help but laugh. In the short time she'd known Kitty, she'd never seen her get so excited about something. "You were pretty good for someone that's only played by yourself."   
  
Kitty paused, bashfully tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Yeah... We were pretty great together, huh? You know, when you first brought it up I thought we'd crash and burn, but now... I think we've got a good chance."   
  
"You just gotta trust me, Kitty," Rammy said, leaning back on the couch with a grin, "We'll wipe out the competition. Crush them under our boots." She emphasized her words with a fist, reveling in the thought. She'd be happy to get this over with.   
  
"... I'd be happy if we can just get past the entry competition," said Kitty, sitting down. "But at least you're enthusiastic."   
  
"As long as that little rat comes through, we'll be fine. I'll push us myself if I have to."   
  
"Right," Kitty sighed, head in her hand. She set aside her pad of paper, their melody scratched onto the paper in a script that was hardly legible. Not that Rammy needed to read it; when it came to playing guitar, she could memorize any song that was thrown at her.   
  
Rammy peered over at Kitty, noticing her sudden silence. "... You know, I don't think I'll be able to go back to bed. You wanna, like, listen to some music? For inspiration, I mean."   
  
A small smile spread on Kitty's face as she rose her head. "Oh, hell yeah. I actually wanted to show you- I found this new band, _Magenta Street Girls_ \- You'll _love_ them."   
  
"Yeah?" Rammy lifted Kitty's laptop from the table, pushing it towards her. "Load 'em up, then!" She rifled for another cigarette as Kitty searched, and once she had it lit and secure between her teeth, a song began to play.   
_  
_ _'You came way too soon,_ _  
_ _That ego confused your girl,_ _  
_ _She thought she had the best of you,'_   
  
The vocals were tinny through the old speakers, the rhythm of the guitars and drum rattling through the room. Rammy leaned back in her haze of smoke and watched Kitty bob her head, mouth moving silently to the words.   
  
_'Never understood,_ _  
_ _Why I was always good_ _  
_ _People rearrange, switch and turn their place,_ _  
_ _Everybody falls now darling,_ _  
_ _But I'll stay the same for you...'_   


* * *

  
  
_“Because I'm mad, oh, yeah,_ _  
_ _I’m mad... like a cat straight outta hell!”_   
  
Rammy marked the end of the song with a final, screeching chord, Ma-sin following up with a closing drum roll. She tossed her sticks into the air with a flourish, then caught them, slamming them down onto her cymbals. Rammy glowered at her, blowing a sweaty lock of hair from her eyes. "Show off."   
  
Kitty let out a hoarse but content sigh. "Okay, I think we got it..." Reaching for her water bottle, she cleared her throat and ran a hand through her damp hair. They were all uncomfortably sweaty; the abandoned building they were practicing in didn't have much of an air flow, and the fact they were all in different shades of black didn't exactly help. "Ugh. It feels like I swallowed a cactus."   
  
"Well don't lose your voice yet," said Rammy, putting down her guitar. "We still have to actually shoot the video." She stretched her arms and wiggled her fingers in an attempt to get her feeling back. She thanked God that she’d been born with hooves; it meant less calluses.   
  
"Well, what's the hold up?" asked Ma-sin. "Are we shooting it now or what?"   
  
Rammy scoffed and tugged her collar. "Like this? We look like waterlogged rats." She ignored the scowl Ma-sin gave her and continued, "No. We're gonna... We gotta get different clothes. We gotta look bad-ass, not like sweaty losers."   
  
"Don't think new clothes are gonna help you there, toots."   
  
The grip Rammy had on her guitar tightened as she took a step towards the drummer. "Listen, you little-"   
  
Before the situation escalated further, Kitty grabbed the back of her shirt, stopping her in her tracks. Rammy looked over her shoulder in betrayal. "We should break for now," stated Kitty, but there was a waver in her voice that sounded like it came from more than just strained vocal chords. "We can take a few to put like... a look together."   
  
"Like, what, matching?" asked Rammy with a quirked eyebrow.   
  
"I mean, not exactly, but..."   
  
"I know a place," piped up Ma-sin, "it's where I get all my clothes."   
  
Rammy immediately felt dubious, but Kitty's ears pricked up and she turned to look at Ma-sin curiously. "Oh, yeah? What's it called?"   
  
"Leather and Lace."   
  
Kitty squinted for a moment, tail twitching. "Wait... the... the bondage shop?"   
  
"Uh, no?" Ma-sin didn't seem fazed by the implication in the slightest. "It's leather outfits, not just-"   
  
Rammy groaned. "Are you- are you kidding me? We're not wearing bondage gear on stage!" She knew this would suck. She knew Ma-sin was a little creep, but she didn't expect it to be _this_ bad-   
  
"It's not bondage gear," insisted Ma-sin, arms crossed.   
  
"Nnno, Rammy's right. It's basically bondage gear."   
  
Rammy, hearing Kitty take her side, continued. "I'm not gonna have my whole ass hanging out on stage!" Ma-sin didn't budge, instead giving them both a short scoff.   
  
"You guys are pussies."   
  
It took everything Rammy had not to scream in frustration. This whole thing was a mistake. Not even one-upping Lammy was worth this. Kitty looked nervously between the two of them, wringing her hands.   
  
"Listen," she stammered, "regardless, we still need a look if we're gonna be a band, right? Something, like, defining."   
  
"We're not a band!" Rammy snapped, making Kitty jump. She would have felt bad if Ma-sin hadn't opened her trap again.   
  
"Then why the hell did you hire me?" she questioned, voice raising.   
  
"We're doing this one thing and that's it," Rammy explained, already annoyed enough, "We win, get the money, split it up, over and done. Not a band." She'd be damned _twice_ over if her first official band had that rat in it.   
  
Kitty shook her head with a frustrated sigh. "Look, whether we're a band or not, we still need a look-"   
  
"My look is sexy," interjected Ma-sin.   
  
"Just- shut up! You aren't a part of this conversation!" Rammy snapped.   
  
"She's just as much part of the band as I am-"   
  
"We aren't a band!"   
  
Ma-sin cut in once again, head in her hands. "Looks like a band to me."   
  
Suppressing the urge to headbut Ma-sin right of her chair, Rammy clenched her teeth. "I swear to God," she growled, one finger pointed at the drummer's nose, "if you say one more thing I'm gonna make you eat a peanut butter and ass sandwich."   
  
A stark silence fell over the three. Ma-sin squinted at her in confusion.   
  
"A... a what?"   
  
Kitty pinched the bridge of her nose, shutting her eyes. "Rammy, you can't... I told you to stop saying that."   
  
"What? Why?"   
  
"Because it's really stupid! You sound like a twelve year old!"   
  
Rammy scoffed. "What? Next you'll tell me to stop saying Rave it to Rammy!"   
  
"You probably should, because I don't know what that even means!" Kitty shouted, flinging her hands in the air. Her voice echoed around the abandoned mall, causing whatever animals hid in the darkness to squeak and scamper farther inside. Rammy blinked at her. Kitty hesitated, shrinking, and grabbed her tail again.   
  
"What the hell are you two even talking about?"   
  
Rammy groaned and crossed her arms. If she wasn't so terrified of her giant hands, she would have punched that little mouse out right then and there. Instead she shook her head, and changed the subject. "Ugh. Whatever. Fine, a look." She thought for a moment, tapping her foot. "Maybe we could do, like, leather jackets or something?"   
  
"What," said Ma-sin, "Like every other shitty punk band ever?"   
  
Kitty drug her hand down her face in frustration. "Look, just do what you want, okay? Rammy and I will figure our outfits out ourselves."   
  
"Whatever," coincided Ma-sin, sliding out of her chair, "As long as I get paid."   
  
Rammy watched her take her leave, feeling quite smug. She knew Kitty would take her side on this. Once she heard the doors of the mall close with an echoing 'Clack,' she turned back to Kitty with a relieved groan. "Thank God, I was about to go _insane."_   
  
"I mean, you were both a little-"   
  
Rammy cut her off. "So, like, leather jackets? You still got that spiked one, right?"   
  
Kitty paused, thinking, then nodded hesitantly. "Yeah, I think so..." She quickly perked up and turned to Rammy, tucking her hair behind her ear. "I also have that really tough looking collar- I mean, if you want me to wear it..."   
  
"Uh. Yeah, sure," Rammy replied, non-committally. She motioned to Kitty's bag, nodding her head to the door. "C'mon, let's get our shit together. We wanna be back before Ma-shit is." She looked at her only long enough to see her roll her eyes.   
  
"Right," she said, enthusiasm noticeably dropping once more, "lemme get my keys..."   
  
The tension between them cleared once they were back inside Kitty's car. Rammy rolled down the window, leaned the seat back, and propped her feet up on the dash. Kitty had popped in a CD; some female metal group Rammy wasn't familiar with. The loud music and the wind on her face cleared her mind and calmed her down.   
  
_It'd be worth it in the end,_ she reminded herself, fingers restlessly tapping on the door.   
  
"So, uh..." Kitty began, scratching the back of her ear with her free hand, "Did you think of a name yet?"   
  
It took a second to process her words. Rammy turned her head to her, confused. "Huh? For what?"   
  
"A name? For the band?" she clarified, turning the radio down slightly.   
  
"I, uh... hadn't thought about it, I guess."   
  
"I mean, it's kind of important… I mean, I could think of one, but..."   
  
_What did it even matter?_ thought Rammy bitterly. _At this point they already looked like a goth Milkcan tribute band, so why put any work into it?_ _  
_   
And then it hit her.   
  
If they won, got a record deal, and got famous, everyone would think Lammy and her band were the rip-offs. They would be the ones who took Lammy’s place, snatching not only the satisfaction but their identity, too. Rammy liked that idea. She’d show that orange hack how it feels.   
  
"Milkcant." She said aloud, sitting up. Kitty gave her a confused look.   
  
"What?"   
  
"That'll be our name! Milkcant."   
  
"Uh... what does that mean, exactly?"   
  
Rammy huffed. She didn't really feel like explaining her motives to Kitty now- the story was already long enough. So she settled for; "Does it matter? We just need a name. Doesn't have to be deep."   
  
Kitty looked back to the road, shrugging her shoulders limply. "I mean, whatever I guess. Should we ask Ma-sin what she thinks?"   
  
"Who cares?" offered Rammy unhelpfully.   
  
"True."   
  
There was a lurch as Kitty parked the car into their driveway. Once they got inside, Rammy immediately fell to her knees, shuffling around in her things for the video camera they’d need. Kitty was behind her, pulling out fresh clothes and the like from the closet.   
  
"Christ," mumbled Rammy, pulling the camcorder out from underneath a forgotten pile of cds, "I haven't used this thing in forever." She blew off the dust and flipped open the side. "Not since that eternally unfinished tour in Hell."   
  
"Never too late to pick it back up," called Kitty over her shoulder.   
  
"Well, it ended at Yoko, so," Rammy said back. She leaned over to stuff the camcorder in her bag, blowing a lock of hair from her face. "Good luck getting _that_ stupid gig back."   
  
Kitty looked back over at her with a cocked eyebrow. "You know... you never told me what happened with that. I mean, it was _Teriyaki Yoko!"_ She stood, slipping on her jacket, and fixed her collar. "People are just _dying_ to get in good with her, right?"   
  
Rammy looked away, avoiding her eyes. Why did she need to know, anyway? So she could laugh at her? What kind of loser would get shown up by a crybaby like _Lammy_ ? Besides, they didn't have time for that. "How's this?" Rammy asked, deflecting the question. She held up a shirt she'd had since her first resurrection. Rammy only vaguely remembered her impulse decision to drunkenly cut off the sleeves with a pair of kitchen shears.   
  
Kitty looked at it with disinterest, giving her a sigh. "I mean, yeah, I guess?"   
  
"Jeez, you could just say I look like crap and move on," snorted Rammy, tossing the shirt to the side. Kitty quickly shook her head.   
  
"N-no, it looks fine, I was just-"   
  
"Great!" interrupted Rammy, not skipping a beat. She looked Kitty up and down, a hand to her chin. "You're looking pretty badass yourself, you know."   
  
"H-huh?" Kitty's ears perked up immediately, like she'd been taken off-guard by the comment. Rammy grinned at her.   
  
"Yeah, that look really works on you,” she continued, stepping forward. “Slap on some eyeshadow and you’d look sick as hell." Kitty’s tail curled around her leg as she looked down at her feet, but Rammy could tell she was smiling underneath all that hair.   
  
“Yeah… Yeah, I guess so,” She mumbled, then bit her lip. She looked up at Rammy and shook her head. “W-well, what are you waiting for? Get dressed, we gotta shoot this thing!”   
  
Rammy watched Kitty hurry off to find some eye shadow, satisfied with her distraction. It was time to get this show on the road.   


* * *

  
  
Ma-sin was already there by the time they'd gotten back. She'd switched out her black dress for a leather corset and a spiked headband, which was overkill with the many spiked bracelets she already wore on her arms.   
  
"'Not a bondage shop' my ass," Kitty mumbled as soon as she laid eyes on her, making Rammy snicker.   
  
Ma-sin, just noticing them, shoved her phone in a pocket that Rammy couldn't believe she had. "There you guys are, Jesus. Been waiting forever."   
  
"Oh, shut up," shot back Rammy, "We were only gone like 15 minutes." Kitty cut in before any more words could be spoken.   
  
"Girls, come _on_ . We need to get this over with."   
  
They both looked at her, then each other, and with a huff they reluctantly got in their places. Kitty moved over to set up Rammy's camera on a stool, making sure to get a clear shot of all three of them. She gave them a thumbs up, then moved back to her bass and slid the strap over her shoulders. She inhaled, slowly, closing her eyes, tail thrashing behind her. Rammy had to wonder, watching her there, if she had suddenly gotten nervous. But Kitty had quickly regained her composure, and her lips curled into a snarl.   
  
“We are MilkcanT!” She spoke into the mic, boldly, and behind her, Rammy struck a low chord. From the corner of her eye Rammy saw Ma-sin look at them in confusion, mouthing a silent ‘what the fuck?’, but shook her head without further dissent. “We are MilkcanT,” Kitty repeated, louder, “And this song’s about hacking up everyone that’s ever wronged you! Let’s go!”   
  
Ma-sin counted out the beat as always, and Rammy immediately followed up with her opening chords, sound tearing through the abandoned mall. Kitty bobbed her head to the beat, seeming more into it now than she had at every previous practice. Rammy supposed she was playing it up for the camera, and she followed suit, rocking her shoulders side to side.   
  
_“I’ll teach you something,_

 _You stole my heart,_ _  
_ _Took all the pieces,_ _  
_ _Like it never mattered to you…_ _  
_ _  
_ _I’m not your plaything,_ _  
_ _I’m not your doll,_ _  
_ _You can’t kick me around,_ _  
_ _Like everyone else…”_   
  
Kitty kicked up her bass playing and signaled for Rammy to follow suit, and she did, slamming down hard on her strings. Kitty looked at her with a grin as she began to yell into the mic, hackles raised, a fire in her eyes. It certainly felt more real, now that they were actually filming it. Like she could feel the reality sinking in.   
_  
_ _“You little beast, you’ll run in shame,_ _  
_ _And you’ll only have yourself to blame,_ _  
_ _I’m not a girl you can drag into the gutter!_ _  
_ _  
_ _Baby, I’m a cat… A cat straight out of hell!”_   
  
Giddy, Kitty moved across the makeshift stage, wailing on her bass, getting more into it as the song progressed. She almost ran into Ma-sin a few times, stopping just short of disaster. Rammy watched her with a small smirk, making sure to hit all the right notes, and sung along with the lyrics. Just like they’d practiced.   
_  
_ _“I'm big and bad_ _  
_ _I'm not afraid to show it_ _  
_ _I'll take you down_ _  
_ _like a screamin' bullet- Oh yeah!_ _  
_ _  
_ _I'll slice you, dice you,_ _  
_ _fillet and spice you_ _  
_ _And don't think that I won't do it, oh yeah!_ _  
_ _  
_ _Because I'm mad... like a cat straight outta hell!”_   
  
Having made her way around on stage, Kitty stopped to stand side by side with Rammy, whose hands worked furiously along her strings. Rammy pressed against her back in response, and, before Kitty could speak again, wailed out a small solo, her brain working to put the chords together in a unique but fitting way. Kitty didn’t miss a beat, and beamed at her behind her long, damp hair. _  
_ _“You could say right now,_ _  
_ _I'm really wired,_ _  
_ _I'll crush you, make you blush,_ _  
_ _and then set you on fire!_ _  
_ _  
_ _Keep you underneath my heel_ _  
_ _I will make you want to kneel_ _  
_ _and when you see me from the floor_ _  
_ _you'll be begging me for more!_ _  
_ _  
_ _Because I'm mad, oh, yeah,_ _  
_ _I’m mad... like a cat straight outta hell!”_ _  
_ _  
_ With one final yowl, Kitty kicked the mic over, causing a loud, cacophonous feedback to wail over the speakers. Ma-sin hissed, putting a hand to her ear. Kitty didn’t seem phased at all. Her breathing was coarse, and it took her a minute before she realized what she’d done.   
  
“O-oh. Uh, sorry about that…” She reached over to pick it up with a nervous glance to the camera. “We as a band are actually against crazy revenge murder. You know, even with the off chance that they come back. Just in case there’s confusion.”   
  
Rammy couldn’t help but laugh. “God damn, Kitty. You really brought your A game.”   
  
Kitty nervously chuckled, brushing her hair out of her face. “Yeah, well... Gotta play it up for the judges.”   
  
Rammy plucked the camera from its stand, making sure to save the video. It might not be perfect, but right now, it was all she had.   
  
“Well, I hope you aren’t played out, because _this,”_ she shook the camcorder with a small smirk, _“_ It’s only the beginning.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [for those interested, this is the song Kitty played for Rammy (:](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hFcJzPz1voM)


End file.
